Ellos! Today is the day after thanksgiving. It was late. I'm bored and chatting with Hilary on AIM as usual and I decided to update this poor abandoned blog. So... I'll be making comments on my life this month. haha
Well... lately the only things on my mind has been: RP, Drawing, Anime, Manga, Restaurant City, Christmas Presents, and Texting Sucks. LOL
(Actually that's quite normal for me)
Eh... well I'll just be pointing out some awesome highlights of this month... except there's only one I can think of right now.
November 17: Happy Birthday Katsuo!
Haha indeed... this month was the Vongola 11th's Cloud Guardian's Birthday! The problem is that... right now... the RP isn't going that well so the poor guardian hasn't even appeared yet.
In celebration of this joyful event, I let the creator of Katsuo (aka Kimchi Kim) a chance to have and wear the Vongola Ring for the day. I even gave her the chain so she didn't have to wear it around her finger. (since it's too big for everyone... except for me... =.=)
Well as I said... the RP is going slowly... Kimchi and I are wayyyy ahead of ourselves with the planning... =.= and Apparently we started to make Varia characters as well...
Sooo... we don't have much planned so far, but we had this much done....
We already planned the next two arcs before the big Time Traveling arc... (we haven't decided what we want to do there...)
Well the two arcs before will be the Training Arc and the Varia Arc.
So far...
Daily Life: the "intro" arc and time to get to know all the characters and the family begins to form....
Training Arc: Preparation for the upcoming Trial against the Varia. The 10th generation come to America to help train the 11th generation.
Varia Arc: We meet the next generation Varia characters officially and the fighting begins (NOBU IS SO DEAD!)
Er... soo... we also came up with the Vongola vs Varia (who is against who chart)
Since... Kimchi and I didn't want to play all the characters... we hope that the peoples are willing to help out playing the Varia... but even so... we assigned the flame attributes to the peoples of which Varia to play.
1 Rule: Cannot play the same attribute
(same went with playing the 10th generation)
Soo... for example: I (playing Nobu[Sky] will not be able to play Tsuna and the Varia Boss) yep yep... [tam was disappointed about not playing Tsuna though.]
So... here were the assignments we came up with...
Tam: >> Nobu >> Gilbert(rain attribute varia) >> Hibari[whyyyy?]
Yujin: >> Katsuo >> Ceri (sky attribute varia [boss]) >> undetermined (poss. Tsuna)
Hil: >> Mei >> Bel? (storm attribute varia) >> undetermined
Mar: >> Lau >> Flam? (mist attribute varia) >> undetermined
Elora: >> Sophia >> undetermined (thunder attribute varia) >> undetermined
Extra: Tam>>Jordan(sun attribute vongola) and Yujin>>Orion(sun attribute varia)
Yujin (replacement for Jessica): Vivian (thunder attribute vongola)
Yep yep... very detailed... kinda unorganized...
But... for some reason I ended up playing Hibari for the 10th generation...
1. Because I said an experienced RPer needed to do Hibari (leaving me, yujin, elora)
2. Yujin = X: cloud attribute and Elora = X: personality could not play
3. Therefore... with deductive reasoning... = Tam play Hibari. >.<
it makes perfect sense... but I'm afraid I cannot play Hibari... time to go do more research...
Eh... well other than the RP stuff... I've been drawing a lot more. I feel like the spirit I had in middle school for drawing has returned and... it's all going good. I'm still not that confident with my drawings, but I find a few of them decent... and put them as my cellphone wallpaper. Well this is needed... since my friend's christmas presents this year consists of these drawings... lets hope I can actually go along with it.
Er... what else was there... .___. hm... OH YES
Recently I've been singing a lot. For some reason I use to think my singing sounds good... now it sounds pretty bad to me... I get a feeling people will become deaf by listening to this.
Well... I think I might post another post er... in... 22 hours from this post haha. Since... I don't think I clearly expressed my month LOL well
Tam out :D
Friday, November 27, 2009
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Halloween Downer
Yesterday was Halloween night and my year of sickness is starting to kick in as the winter seasons are rolling in.
So... on Thursday I got sick, officially and I've been sick since then. I don't know if I'm slowly getting better or getting worse. I never had this type of sickness for so long, and it's different from the usual flu I'm use to... or common cold.
Well yesterday I stayed home and went to drawing class on halloween. Didn't do much there except try to figure out what color I wanted to paint the table....
Ehm... so for the party at elora's house, I was late 30 mins or so since my mom got her eyebrows fixed. She calls it an eyebrow tattoo. I was making fun of it for her (I'm not mean) she was laughing with me. So tis ok...
Well originally I had a huge costume thought out and bought and everything, but I looked so bad in it... I probably will end up not wearing it... since I look really bad in it.
So... I asked my mom if I can be a panda instead... and with black clothes and a white tanktop over it, I was a panda. Adding on some final touches was my panda ear hat from fanime and a small panda stuff animal. I was off to the party
So... the peoples waited for me, which was awesome and we all went out to trick or treat. After going around to most of the houses on Elora's street we called Yujin and told her to start walking towards us and we'll meet up with her in the middle. Apparently Kimchi didn't have a costume, but it should be fine, since the trick or treating part was pretty much over anyways.
We went to Elora's house and started to eat the food and candy that was there. I ate my "dinner" lollipops, cookies, and pizza bagels. The other peoples were deciding of what movie to watch. We were originally going to watch "Sleepy Hallow" since apparently it wasn't that scary, but then people wanted to watch "The Messengers" and "Coraline" In the end, The messengers won the vote for watching first and Coraline second. But I doubted we were going to have enough time to watch a second movie.
As I shivered on the couch frightened about the movie we were watching. At first it wasn't too bad since Thomas wouldn't stop talking and making fun of the movie so it wasn't that scary.
Soon after the movie began, Kristen got a phone call from her sister and half the people left to go to Kristen's house. While the movie was paused, only four people were left. Elora, Thomas, Yujin, and me. We just circled around the table, munched on the food, and talked as we waited, as I did my best to endure the fever that was coming to me.
Thomas continuously bashed about Pranita... it was... sad to listen. But we also talked about different things and soon after the peoples that left returned.
Everyone switched seats and I ended up sitting at the very side next to Yujin. Even though Mar, Hilary, and Yujin were all right beside me, my back side didn't feel very safe watching a horror movie. I had to close my eyes at a few parts and eventually I started shaking non stop. My eyes started to water and my breathing got heavy. I was clinging on to Yujin in fear and eventually I was crying.
I did my best to stop crying since it's just plain stupid to cry, but my shaking leg gave me away and Marisa and Hilary noticed my fear. I didn't want to leave the movie, since I didn't want to seem like a coward, but everyone told me that I should, so I did.
Yujin, Elora, and Pranita came with me to see if I was ok. I was generally fine, but my leg was still shaking as I tried to hide my tears. I was glad there were people that cared about me, but I didn't get why Pranita was there. As much as a friend I find her, I would think she would be the one who cared the least about me. But that didn't really matter.
I tried to get as many people back into the movie as quickly as possible since I didn't want to keep them from enjoying their night, but Yujin promised to stay with me earlier in the week.
Together we tried to find happier subjects on the internet instead. Playing Restaurant city and looking at Darker than Black pictures on e-shuushuu.net.
Eventually the movie ended and Elora came in to check on us, telling us the results of the movie. I did my best not to IMAGINE the scenes, for that would get me scared too.
Well... apparently Mar and Hilary already left without saying bye, and most of the other people had already left. The remanding people just sat on the couch and talked since it was already clear that there was not enough time to watch Coraline.
Eventually I want home along, trying to keep the fact that we watched a scary movie from my mom (since she would get mad). But by then, I was really suffering from a fever. My head throbbed and I felt really warm even though I still shivered.
I went home, took a shower, and went straight to bed after taking in some medicine before my parents could even question what was wrong with me.
So... that was my Halloween this year. On my anime note, here's a KHR video I saved for a month just for this halloween post.
So... on Thursday I got sick, officially and I've been sick since then. I don't know if I'm slowly getting better or getting worse. I never had this type of sickness for so long, and it's different from the usual flu I'm use to... or common cold.
Well yesterday I stayed home and went to drawing class on halloween. Didn't do much there except try to figure out what color I wanted to paint the table....
Ehm... so for the party at elora's house, I was late 30 mins or so since my mom got her eyebrows fixed. She calls it an eyebrow tattoo. I was making fun of it for her (I'm not mean) she was laughing with me. So tis ok...
Well originally I had a huge costume thought out and bought and everything, but I looked so bad in it... I probably will end up not wearing it... since I look really bad in it.
So... I asked my mom if I can be a panda instead... and with black clothes and a white tanktop over it, I was a panda. Adding on some final touches was my panda ear hat from fanime and a small panda stuff animal. I was off to the party
So... the peoples waited for me, which was awesome and we all went out to trick or treat. After going around to most of the houses on Elora's street we called Yujin and told her to start walking towards us and we'll meet up with her in the middle. Apparently Kimchi didn't have a costume, but it should be fine, since the trick or treating part was pretty much over anyways.
We went to Elora's house and started to eat the food and candy that was there. I ate my "dinner" lollipops, cookies, and pizza bagels. The other peoples were deciding of what movie to watch. We were originally going to watch "Sleepy Hallow" since apparently it wasn't that scary, but then people wanted to watch "The Messengers" and "Coraline" In the end, The messengers won the vote for watching first and Coraline second. But I doubted we were going to have enough time to watch a second movie.
As I shivered on the couch frightened about the movie we were watching. At first it wasn't too bad since Thomas wouldn't stop talking and making fun of the movie so it wasn't that scary.
Soon after the movie began, Kristen got a phone call from her sister and half the people left to go to Kristen's house. While the movie was paused, only four people were left. Elora, Thomas, Yujin, and me. We just circled around the table, munched on the food, and talked as we waited, as I did my best to endure the fever that was coming to me.
Thomas continuously bashed about Pranita... it was... sad to listen. But we also talked about different things and soon after the peoples that left returned.
Everyone switched seats and I ended up sitting at the very side next to Yujin. Even though Mar, Hilary, and Yujin were all right beside me, my back side didn't feel very safe watching a horror movie. I had to close my eyes at a few parts and eventually I started shaking non stop. My eyes started to water and my breathing got heavy. I was clinging on to Yujin in fear and eventually I was crying.
I did my best to stop crying since it's just plain stupid to cry, but my shaking leg gave me away and Marisa and Hilary noticed my fear. I didn't want to leave the movie, since I didn't want to seem like a coward, but everyone told me that I should, so I did.
Yujin, Elora, and Pranita came with me to see if I was ok. I was generally fine, but my leg was still shaking as I tried to hide my tears. I was glad there were people that cared about me, but I didn't get why Pranita was there. As much as a friend I find her, I would think she would be the one who cared the least about me. But that didn't really matter.
I tried to get as many people back into the movie as quickly as possible since I didn't want to keep them from enjoying their night, but Yujin promised to stay with me earlier in the week.
Together we tried to find happier subjects on the internet instead. Playing Restaurant city and looking at Darker than Black pictures on e-shuushuu.net.
Eventually the movie ended and Elora came in to check on us, telling us the results of the movie. I did my best not to IMAGINE the scenes, for that would get me scared too.
Well... apparently Mar and Hilary already left without saying bye, and most of the other people had already left. The remanding people just sat on the couch and talked since it was already clear that there was not enough time to watch Coraline.
Eventually I want home along, trying to keep the fact that we watched a scary movie from my mom (since she would get mad). But by then, I was really suffering from a fever. My head throbbed and I felt really warm even though I still shivered.
I went home, took a shower, and went straight to bed after taking in some medicine before my parents could even question what was wrong with me.
So... that was my Halloween this year. On my anime note, here's a KHR video I saved for a month just for this halloween post.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
009 Awesomeness!
Moshi! wow... it's been a week.. X3
Well Today was my awesome Wisdom 009 training October Meeting.
All I have to say is that... I'm so looking forward to hosting the meeting in December!
We have a "White Elephant" idea planned and tis in store for the other 009 members!
I'm so glad the meeting is during December! Since... as everyone who knows me well enough knows that I absolutely LOVE giving gifts during Christmas. What's awesome is that I can give everyone a gift. So that day is all equal. Maybe a little extra here and there would be awesome X3
I started my Present Planning notebook and already three pages are filled up. I have so much planned for Christmas and has already started on planning the sweet 16 birthday present's of my awesome friends!
Each present will have at least 6 parts to it! I am quite excited for this! Giving my friends presents and seeing them happy about receiving it is the most joy I can receive for the day.
Recently... I have two animes I completely love right now... Katekyo Hitman Reborn and Kimi ni Todoke!
Kimi ni Todoke is such a sweet manga/anime series. This season it was adapted into an anime, which I am now currently watching happily.
I really love this series since it gives me the warm fuzzy feelings of making friends and finding love. Such a cute plot and everything!
Apparently I want all the manga volumes for this... Japanese or English I don't really care. Hopefully my Japanese can get fluent enough to read it without struggle, but that might take a while...
The character in the Kimi ni Todoke (aka Reaching you) is this girl name Sawako. I love her... She is the most idealistic personality I have every discovered. I love how cute, modest, and optimistic she is!
I have adopted her motto: "One good deed a day!"
I hope I can continue with this motto... it would make me really happy if I can
Halloween is coming up soon! I got my costume... and I think I look really bad in it XD
Hopefully the makeup and hairstyle I'm going to do will make me look better? Hopefully... I might have to do some adjustments to it.
This weekend I also came up with an awesome idea for my friends for Halloween one year. I suggested that we should do a group costume theme, and after thinking about it. I think doing something like Alice in Wonderland would be fun.
We can do characters like Alice (of course), the White Rabbit, the Cheeshe Cat, Mad Hatter, and the Queen of Hearts. I find it an awesome idea!
Though... I get a feeling all my friends are going to shoot me down... so I'm going to prepare myself!
During this time... I also came up with a huge list of things we can do during Japanese club! Apparently... I'm going to make a condition to myself that for these activities to be suggested into circulation... I must have an officer position and also have credit and influence...
I might describe the roles and the most possible officer positions for next year in my next post... possibly...
I hope Kimchi starts the Vongola XI generation RP soon! I'm quite excited for it... Apparently 2 parts of the 6 for Christmas is based on this RP and these roles... I hope I'm not taken it too far... but I think I crossed that line longgg ago... XD
Well it's almost time to sleep for me... 10 mins to 12 which means time to wrap up the day for Tam! :D
Well Today was my awesome Wisdom 009 training October Meeting.
All I have to say is that... I'm so looking forward to hosting the meeting in December!
We have a "White Elephant" idea planned and tis in store for the other 009 members!
I'm so glad the meeting is during December! Since... as everyone who knows me well enough knows that I absolutely LOVE giving gifts during Christmas. What's awesome is that I can give everyone a gift. So that day is all equal. Maybe a little extra here and there would be awesome X3
I started my Present Planning notebook and already three pages are filled up. I have so much planned for Christmas and has already started on planning the sweet 16 birthday present's of my awesome friends!
Each present will have at least 6 parts to it! I am quite excited for this! Giving my friends presents and seeing them happy about receiving it is the most joy I can receive for the day.
Recently... I have two animes I completely love right now... Katekyo Hitman Reborn and Kimi ni Todoke!
Kimi ni Todoke is such a sweet manga/anime series. This season it was adapted into an anime, which I am now currently watching happily.
I really love this series since it gives me the warm fuzzy feelings of making friends and finding love. Such a cute plot and everything!
Apparently I want all the manga volumes for this... Japanese or English I don't really care. Hopefully my Japanese can get fluent enough to read it without struggle, but that might take a while...
The character in the Kimi ni Todoke (aka Reaching you) is this girl name Sawako. I love her... She is the most idealistic personality I have every discovered. I love how cute, modest, and optimistic she is!
I have adopted her motto: "One good deed a day!"
I hope I can continue with this motto... it would make me really happy if I can
Halloween is coming up soon! I got my costume... and I think I look really bad in it XD
Hopefully the makeup and hairstyle I'm going to do will make me look better? Hopefully... I might have to do some adjustments to it.
This weekend I also came up with an awesome idea for my friends for Halloween one year. I suggested that we should do a group costume theme, and after thinking about it. I think doing something like Alice in Wonderland would be fun.
We can do characters like Alice (of course), the White Rabbit, the Cheeshe Cat, Mad Hatter, and the Queen of Hearts. I find it an awesome idea!
Though... I get a feeling all my friends are going to shoot me down... so I'm going to prepare myself!
During this time... I also came up with a huge list of things we can do during Japanese club! Apparently... I'm going to make a condition to myself that for these activities to be suggested into circulation... I must have an officer position and also have credit and influence...
I might describe the roles and the most possible officer positions for next year in my next post... possibly...
I hope Kimchi starts the Vongola XI generation RP soon! I'm quite excited for it... Apparently 2 parts of the 6 for Christmas is based on this RP and these roles... I hope I'm not taken it too far... but I think I crossed that line longgg ago... XD
Well it's almost time to sleep for me... 10 mins to 12 which means time to wrap up the day for Tam! :D
Sunday, October 18, 2009
誕生日おめてとMaru-Chan
Being October 18 today, one thing comes to mind... MARU-CHAN's Birthday :D
Today was a pretty busy day as well. With the Chinese school, Eating lunch with Grandparents, and Maruchan's Birthday Dinner/Party.
I don't really want to talk about anything but Mar's Birthday Party today since I don't care about Chinese and Grandparent's weekly lunch.
At around 2 I returned home and immediately went to my table to finish drawing and coloring Mar's birthday Flashcard. It turned out quite well. I liked the card very much. It included my random chibis that don't take too long to draw and some random drawings that I think mar would like.
My worst/best/pun/joke was a drawing of a clock and it read 2 pm with an arrow. OMG it's 2 pm!
Hilary laughed at my pun. My sense of humor is so lame.
I'm not sure if Marisa liked the present or not... which kinda worries me.
Well... the whole time were were bored and looking at the movies there. So... apparently Mar and Hilary chose to watch Mr. & Mrs. Smith.
Elora came after and apparently Yujin wasn't picking up her phone nor answering texts, so I called her home phone.
Apparently trying to convince her to come... she ended up not showing up. But on wells...
We decided to watch the movie anyways. It was a good refresher about what happened in the movie... quite interesting...
Well we ate dinner afterwards and knowing Marisa and her opinion on cake... I didn't think she would have one. So once I finished eating at was already 6:30 and I called home to tell my parents it was ok to pick me up now.
Apparently I didn't know Marisa actually decided to have cake and my parents got here before we could cut the cake. I got in the car and told my parents that I called them too early and that I didn't even eat cake.
My parents were shocked and U-turned, immediately sending me back to Marisa's house to eat the cake. I rang the doorbell embarrassed about returning for cake and celebrated the rest of Marisa's party.
Eventually I went home, and Maru-Chan's party came to an end. X3
Today was a pretty busy day as well. With the Chinese school, Eating lunch with Grandparents, and Maruchan's Birthday Dinner/Party.
I don't really want to talk about anything but Mar's Birthday Party today since I don't care about Chinese and Grandparent's weekly lunch.
At around 2 I returned home and immediately went to my table to finish drawing and coloring Mar's birthday Flashcard. It turned out quite well. I liked the card very much. It included my random chibis that don't take too long to draw and some random drawings that I think mar would like.
My worst/best/pun/joke was a drawing of a clock and it read 2 pm with an arrow. OMG it's 2 pm!
Hilary laughed at my pun. My sense of humor is so lame.
I'm not sure if Marisa liked the present or not... which kinda worries me.
Well... the whole time were were bored and looking at the movies there. So... apparently Mar and Hilary chose to watch Mr. & Mrs. Smith.
Elora came after and apparently Yujin wasn't picking up her phone nor answering texts, so I called her home phone.
Apparently trying to convince her to come... she ended up not showing up. But on wells...
We decided to watch the movie anyways. It was a good refresher about what happened in the movie... quite interesting...
Well we ate dinner afterwards and knowing Marisa and her opinion on cake... I didn't think she would have one. So once I finished eating at was already 6:30 and I called home to tell my parents it was ok to pick me up now.
Apparently I didn't know Marisa actually decided to have cake and my parents got here before we could cut the cake. I got in the car and told my parents that I called them too early and that I didn't even eat cake.
My parents were shocked and U-turned, immediately sending me back to Marisa's house to eat the cake. I rang the doorbell embarrassed about returning for cake and celebrated the rest of Marisa's party.
Eventually I went home, and Maru-Chan's party came to an end. X3
First Homecoming
Well I'm going to write a post for yesterday's events as well as today's later in another post since I like to write a lot....
Well in yesterday being "today"
Today was a busy day from morning to evening.
Morning was the PSAT, getting up at 6:45 to get ready for the dang test. I was tired, but not completely, just I didn't want to deal with it. I was in the "my eyes are open and my brain is working, but I'm still going to look sleepy" mode.
I was sitting there for a while with some people I don't know. I only knew Justin Chau and Kevin Chen, then Iris came in... and Yujin came late, then Munchkin, and Francis.
Well I guess that's not too bad... but I don't really care, just a test anyways.
So... I'm not very confident, I've always been shaky in English and Math I had some tweaks, so I'm not sure how I did... hopefully I did decent. I get a feeling I'm going to cry during December since I'm unlucky and not that smart.
So... we were let out around 30 minutes early and I went to Yujin house, that I will regret doing later.
After a while, Hilary called Yujin's cell and passed it to me, Mar was mad at me... again... Ugh... I was mad at myself and stressing about it for a long time. I felt a bit depressed afterwards.
Well I decided to stay at Yujin's since her mom was kind enough to make dinner for me. She made spicy instant ramen for me, it was quite good, not as spicy as I imagined, so I guess my problem with spice and heat isn't too bad. Well... I still hate food that's too hot since I burn my tongue. But... I did have a glass of iced water by my side.
So... afterwards... I went home and took a long nap since apparently I was tired. Usually I would take a nap in the car since I would go from Pleasanton to Fremont for art class. Indeed....
Continuing, I slept a lot. Until... 3? so I only had around an hour to get ready for homecoming.
So I slipped into my dress and started to pamper. It too me and my mom forever to choose what pair of shoes to wear. I ended up wearing a pair of really high, but really pretty shoes. My mom said it matched my dress as well.
So off I went again, going to pick up Jessica from her house. Apparently she got the time wrong and I had to wait for her to dress. I met her sister and two cousins. Haha her little sister was funny. They were like "Oh... who's she Jessica?", "Why is she wearing a dress Jessica?", "Where are you going Jessica?"
I told them we were going to a dance... and apparently they thought it was a date? So all three of them were like.
"Haha Jessica's going on a dance Jessica's going on a dance."
So... afterwards back to Yujins! Since I needed to fulfill the bet we made... deal we made. To put on makeup for the dance.
So apparently I was late 11 mins along with Jessica, and Marisa and Hilary were even later. But this ok... I found some home magazines and started to look through them.
Yujin's mom came back... 5:30? well pretty late... later than we imagined and the three of us (Mar, Yujin, and I) were stuffed into the downstairs bathroom and having makeup put on us. Yujin and Marisa looked really pretty. I couldn't really tell the difference on me, but it didn't matter. I already fulfilled my side of the deal.
So... since we were running late to Kristen's house, Jessica and Hilary went ahead as Mar, Yujin, and I stayed back to finish our make up. Later walking to Kristen's as well.
At Kristen's we got pictures taken and it was dinner time. DANG! Kristen's parents went ALL OUT! It was beautiful and so... formal... with pasta and the table was all set neatly with candles and the fancy eating utensils. I was so embarrassed that I couldn't do anything in thanks for the wonderful dinner.
So the dance was about to start soon and everyone walked over to Foothill. The lines were so long! I was frightened by the length. DANGGG~!
Well so waiting in line we talked and such... apparently Mar saw Kouhei again... and was like "OH!" I only saw his back as he walked away.
So... we went it... and it was sooo hot... I was sweating the minute I went in. It was chaos. I was feeling uncomfortable already. Haha.
I danced a bit, it was quite fun. Whenever we took a break and ran out of the gym it felt extremely nice. The back room was always filled with people trying to go in and out. I didn't know you could get out from the front, so we stayed near the entrance since it was a good escape from the humidity.
Well I did talk to Kouhei like I promised myself.
I saw him in the crowd as he walked pass me and I yelled his name so he could hear above the blasting music.
Playing out the Conv:
Me: ... -blink blink- KOUHEI!
Kouhei: ... -turns- ? oh..
Me: Hiii :)
Kouhei: Hi
Me: How are you?
Kouhei: Fine...
Me: ... :o where's your date? I heard you had one...
Kouhei: She ran off... =.= I'm now looking for her..
Me: Haha... that sucks... I hope you find her ^^;
Kouhei: yeah... looks around in the crowd...
Me: You look awesome ;) talk to you later in life haha
Kouhei: yeah... -goes back to looking-
Still no reaction, but I don't mind... I just want to talk and have things more loose around us. Might never happen, but at least I won't regret it later in life. And I approach as friends :) I can cheer for whoever this Mimi person is :D lol
Well... I continued to dance with my friends, since it always makes things funner with friends.
By 10 people started to panic about leaving. I had to leave it 10:30... but we were facing conflicts like always when it's time for us to leave a fun night behind and call it a day.
So... apparently Hilary disappeared in the crowd again and nobody could find her, so I had to leave since my parents were mad at me. (Dad yelling in background as mom continued to call me)
I walked back to Yujin's house with Jessica and almost twisted my ankle from the heals by walking on the tanbark. It was painful... I limped and it was better... I guess no lingering pain.
So... ending my night was going to Yujin's house and resting our feet by sitting on the front porch singing to Sakura Addiction and looking at the cloud covered night sky.
Well in yesterday being "today"
Today was a busy day from morning to evening.
Morning was the PSAT, getting up at 6:45 to get ready for the dang test. I was tired, but not completely, just I didn't want to deal with it. I was in the "my eyes are open and my brain is working, but I'm still going to look sleepy" mode.
I was sitting there for a while with some people I don't know. I only knew Justin Chau and Kevin Chen, then Iris came in... and Yujin came late, then Munchkin, and Francis.
Well I guess that's not too bad... but I don't really care, just a test anyways.
So... I'm not very confident, I've always been shaky in English and Math I had some tweaks, so I'm not sure how I did... hopefully I did decent. I get a feeling I'm going to cry during December since I'm unlucky and not that smart.
So... we were let out around 30 minutes early and I went to Yujin house, that I will regret doing later.
After a while, Hilary called Yujin's cell and passed it to me, Mar was mad at me... again... Ugh... I was mad at myself and stressing about it for a long time. I felt a bit depressed afterwards.
Well I decided to stay at Yujin's since her mom was kind enough to make dinner for me. She made spicy instant ramen for me, it was quite good, not as spicy as I imagined, so I guess my problem with spice and heat isn't too bad. Well... I still hate food that's too hot since I burn my tongue. But... I did have a glass of iced water by my side.
So... afterwards... I went home and took a long nap since apparently I was tired. Usually I would take a nap in the car since I would go from Pleasanton to Fremont for art class. Indeed....
Continuing, I slept a lot. Until... 3? so I only had around an hour to get ready for homecoming.
So I slipped into my dress and started to pamper. It too me and my mom forever to choose what pair of shoes to wear. I ended up wearing a pair of really high, but really pretty shoes. My mom said it matched my dress as well.
So off I went again, going to pick up Jessica from her house. Apparently she got the time wrong and I had to wait for her to dress. I met her sister and two cousins. Haha her little sister was funny. They were like "Oh... who's she Jessica?", "Why is she wearing a dress Jessica?", "Where are you going Jessica?"
I told them we were going to a dance... and apparently they thought it was a date? So all three of them were like.
"Haha Jessica's going on a dance Jessica's going on a dance."
So... afterwards back to Yujins! Since I needed to fulfill the bet we made... deal we made. To put on makeup for the dance.
So apparently I was late 11 mins along with Jessica, and Marisa and Hilary were even later. But this ok... I found some home magazines and started to look through them.
Yujin's mom came back... 5:30? well pretty late... later than we imagined and the three of us (Mar, Yujin, and I) were stuffed into the downstairs bathroom and having makeup put on us. Yujin and Marisa looked really pretty. I couldn't really tell the difference on me, but it didn't matter. I already fulfilled my side of the deal.
So... since we were running late to Kristen's house, Jessica and Hilary went ahead as Mar, Yujin, and I stayed back to finish our make up. Later walking to Kristen's as well.
At Kristen's we got pictures taken and it was dinner time. DANG! Kristen's parents went ALL OUT! It was beautiful and so... formal... with pasta and the table was all set neatly with candles and the fancy eating utensils. I was so embarrassed that I couldn't do anything in thanks for the wonderful dinner.
So the dance was about to start soon and everyone walked over to Foothill. The lines were so long! I was frightened by the length. DANGGG~!
Well so waiting in line we talked and such... apparently Mar saw Kouhei again... and was like "OH!" I only saw his back as he walked away.
So... we went it... and it was sooo hot... I was sweating the minute I went in. It was chaos. I was feeling uncomfortable already. Haha.
I danced a bit, it was quite fun. Whenever we took a break and ran out of the gym it felt extremely nice. The back room was always filled with people trying to go in and out. I didn't know you could get out from the front, so we stayed near the entrance since it was a good escape from the humidity.
Well I did talk to Kouhei like I promised myself.
I saw him in the crowd as he walked pass me and I yelled his name so he could hear above the blasting music.
Playing out the Conv:
Me: ... -blink blink- KOUHEI!
Kouhei: ... -turns- ? oh..
Me: Hiii :)
Kouhei: Hi
Me: How are you?
Kouhei: Fine...
Me: ... :o where's your date? I heard you had one...
Kouhei: She ran off... =.= I'm now looking for her..
Me: Haha... that sucks... I hope you find her ^^;
Kouhei: yeah... looks around in the crowd...
Me: You look awesome ;) talk to you later in life haha
Kouhei: yeah... -goes back to looking-
Still no reaction, but I don't mind... I just want to talk and have things more loose around us. Might never happen, but at least I won't regret it later in life. And I approach as friends :) I can cheer for whoever this Mimi person is :D lol
Well... I continued to dance with my friends, since it always makes things funner with friends.
By 10 people started to panic about leaving. I had to leave it 10:30... but we were facing conflicts like always when it's time for us to leave a fun night behind and call it a day.
So... apparently Hilary disappeared in the crowd again and nobody could find her, so I had to leave since my parents were mad at me. (Dad yelling in background as mom continued to call me)
I walked back to Yujin's house with Jessica and almost twisted my ankle from the heals by walking on the tanbark. It was painful... I limped and it was better... I guess no lingering pain.
So... ending my night was going to Yujin's house and resting our feet by sitting on the front porch singing to Sakura Addiction and looking at the cloud covered night sky.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
As the Rain Falls...
Today lots happened I guess. I really don't want to talk about it, but at the same time... I need to.
Truth is...
I'm not quite sure what to say anymore... I don't know what to do anymore.... All I know is that... I am human Skum...
My drama queen side is raging on... I cannot keep from my old self from returning. It's been too long... too long...
Today I asked myself... "haven't you've been happy for too long now?"
and in my dream as I decided to curl up into my bed and sob a little. "
"Isn't it time for you to suffer again?"
I thought about it... I guess...
I don't think I deserve to be this upset, but I'm starting to think I don't deserve what I have. Everything was a mistake that you carved out yourself. Something you forced out of others.
Tammy Cheng... you are such a manipulative, evil person.
You manipulative girl who acts innocently to get your way, and when you don't you use the most stupid words to get people to feel bad. Then when they agree with you and feel bad, you just sprinkle more salt on the wound and get mad.
Tammy Cheng... I hate you... I hate myself. I hate myself for being like this. After all the effort I've put into changing you.
What Sky Guardian... you don't deserve it... You don't even deserve your group of friends.
You treacherous girl who breaks promises and only works on your own desires. You don't deserve life... you've over stayed your welcome... now your just pushing it.
Know that your nature will cause your friends to hate you and later leave you. The people you cherish will look down on you. It is what is to come...
Tammy Cheng... you don't deserve this life.... say goodbye to your current life and prepare for it to turn on you.
Truth is...
I'm not quite sure what to say anymore... I don't know what to do anymore.... All I know is that... I am human Skum...
My drama queen side is raging on... I cannot keep from my old self from returning. It's been too long... too long...
Today I asked myself... "haven't you've been happy for too long now?"
and in my dream as I decided to curl up into my bed and sob a little. "
"Isn't it time for you to suffer again?"
I thought about it... I guess...
I don't think I deserve to be this upset, but I'm starting to think I don't deserve what I have. Everything was a mistake that you carved out yourself. Something you forced out of others.
Tammy Cheng... you are such a manipulative, evil person.
You manipulative girl who acts innocently to get your way, and when you don't you use the most stupid words to get people to feel bad. Then when they agree with you and feel bad, you just sprinkle more salt on the wound and get mad.
Tammy Cheng... I hate you... I hate myself. I hate myself for being like this. After all the effort I've put into changing you.
What Sky Guardian... you don't deserve it... You don't even deserve your group of friends.
You treacherous girl who breaks promises and only works on your own desires. You don't deserve life... you've over stayed your welcome... now your just pushing it.
Know that your nature will cause your friends to hate you and later leave you. The people you cherish will look down on you. It is what is to come...
Tammy Cheng... you don't deserve this life.... say goodbye to your current life and prepare for it to turn on you.
Friday, October 9, 2009
Conclusion Reached, Chance Missed!
Ugh... today I missed a perfect chance to talk to Kouhei. I already had everything planned out as well. But I was not emotionally prepared yet.
Apparently he doesn't recognize me, or doesn't remember me... either way.
Well I don't blame him, but do I look that different from what I was before... I should put my hair up in a headband that day when I want to talk to him. (since that was 5th grade hairstyle). Would that be too weird? Do I look that different? O.O
Sure my hair has gotten shorter.... but do I look that different? I think I look more like I was in 5th grade now compared how I looked in 7th grade.
Well I already decided.
I want to talk to him as a friend. I don't see him (or try not to) see him in any "romantic" relationship. Well... I might... but I'm going to take the advice I gave Mar with her similar situation
I feel better think about it this way. I'm still get kinda nervous around him (current me), but I think... his return kinda reminded me of the elementary school Tam.
The one that was alone and had no friends, so I had to be more active and talk to everyone. In elementary school, I hated leaving a regret later in life, so I always confessed when I DID like a guy... (every year =.=)
Tam so Fickle! (that's what caused the phobia later in life)
Well my heart has settled as well... to a decent amount
Today I was given a chance to talk to him after Japanese as I walked out the door. Apparently he had a class before that was... pretty close to the Jap class and that the group he sat with for lunch was near the classroom. I want to take this chance given to me!
I finally saw him. Of course he didn't really see me. But danggg it really is him O.O
He still has the same features from 5th grade... and still pretty tall. (Dang... still beat me from 5th grade, I haven't grown since...) HAHA of course... and his hair is slightly different, but I can tell it's still him.
But... I got worried as I peaked at him during lunch. In elementary school he would be able to laugh at anything and was a very cheerful and positive guy... but today he looked pretty down.
Yujin told me that he looked like a social outcast and lonely, which I don't get since... he apparently asked his own date out... 2 weeks before the dance. Apparently that's a sign of liking someone, so he should've at least talked to her.
Well... maybe he just transferred here recent, so he didn't get to know more people. If that's the case I'm willing to be his friend again :) haha
I'm going to take my next chance on Monday, if not I'm going to talk to him during Japanese Club (if I notice him and not be too preoccupied with what's going on in the club).
Haha... (highly possible since apparently I just walked pass him going to the bathroom on Tuesday) Mar might have to help me acknowledge his presence in the room. XD aha...
Well... I love Yujin right now. She's supportive right now. Mar is awesome too in the case, but she has her own problems to deal with as well and I don't want to trouble her with mine since I reached a resolution in less than a week. HAHA
Yujin was completely flattering me. During lunch I told her that Kouhei was right "behind" me kinda outside the Japanese room and she was so eager to check him out.
Haha to see if he's "worthy of me" (so much lying) though... I couldn't help to feel happy when she said that he's pretty good looking. It made me think "YES my judgment in guys isn't completely gullible"
Well I refuse to let this guy take over 2 of my posts so I'm going to talk about anime, friends, and afterschool stuff.
Well... apparently Mar is having problems. She has reached her conclusion, but I think she's taking her conclusion the wrong way.
She makes it sound like she's going to completely give up on Justin... as well as not helping him if he needs a friend to support him.
As I say, "Just be friends, if it works out then it's natural if not, then it might not be meant to be"
Haha... I just hate how it has to be the girl that does all the work... =.= UGHHH HAHA
Hm... well Yujin gave me a preview of my Christmas Card. She said she felt bad for not giving me one last year (being the only one...) and is giving me a super card for christmas.
I'm sooooo excited to see it. I looked at 2 of the (6? 8?) pages that were finished and was amazed at the cover. I LOVED IT! <3
I could almost cry tears on how touched I was... Haha well since it looked like me looking like Tsuna in Hyper mode.
My Nobu being in Hyper mode makes me sooo happy. I refused to read what she had so far so that most of it will be a surprise during christmas. I love surprises, even if I hate waiting for the surprise. HAHA I enjoy the unpredictable? hehe...
She said she wrote a random quote around a page but it just made me feel even happier.
"The generation that surpassed the rest and set an example for future generations...." I can't quite remember it that well, but reading it... I felt completely embedded in the group and that I was truly irreplaceable. I swear if I read it again during Christmas I might cry since I'm so emotional like so XD
I love it when Kimchi draws for me, since it's so pretty and cool and completely different from my style. Ahhhh~ I love her styleeee~ I always get annoyed when she says it's bad... =.=
Well... I love my Vongola 11th character, Sawada Nobuko!
I want to explain my reason for naming her this before I forget.
Well... Iemitsu and Tsunayoshi are both shogun of the Tokugawa era. So... I wanted to see the successor of Tsunayoshi (aka Tsuna). I looked it up and got the name Ienobu, the nephew of Tsunayoshi. Of course... it was a boy name so I took the "Nobu" part and added "Ko" to make it sound more fem. So... My character Nobuko will the be niece of Tsuna (10th Vongola).
Vongola Undecimo! Sawada Nobuko! (do I need an Italian name O.O?) NAHHH!
Well... thanks to Yujin I have an idea myself...
I found this quote: "Chosen ones who have received one of the Vongola rings. Rings that were delivered to people who are worthy of protecting the next Vongola boss Sawada Nobuko." (adding my character's name of course) and I'm going to draw individual pictures.
It's going to be awesome!
Well I have a busy weekend coming up >.< so wish me luck. I'll try to talk about it as the week goes by. Like on Sunday during chinese school or something. XD While Sandra peeks over my shoulder.
Well I got a Chinese test to... so wish me luck!
Japanese Food tomorrow for Dinner! Me ish sooo excited! :3 See ya!
Apparently he doesn't recognize me, or doesn't remember me... either way.
Well I don't blame him, but do I look that different from what I was before... I should put my hair up in a headband that day when I want to talk to him. (since that was 5th grade hairstyle). Would that be too weird? Do I look that different? O.O
Sure my hair has gotten shorter.... but do I look that different? I think I look more like I was in 5th grade now compared how I looked in 7th grade.
Well I already decided.
I want to talk to him as a friend. I don't see him (or try not to) see him in any "romantic" relationship. Well... I might... but I'm going to take the advice I gave Mar with her similar situation
"Just be friends. If it happens then it's natural, if it doesn't then it's probably not meant to be. Just let faith take you...
I feel better think about it this way. I'm still get kinda nervous around him (current me), but I think... his return kinda reminded me of the elementary school Tam.
The one that was alone and had no friends, so I had to be more active and talk to everyone. In elementary school, I hated leaving a regret later in life, so I always confessed when I DID like a guy... (every year =.=)
Tam so Fickle! (that's what caused the phobia later in life)
Well my heart has settled as well... to a decent amount
Today I was given a chance to talk to him after Japanese as I walked out the door. Apparently he had a class before that was... pretty close to the Jap class and that the group he sat with for lunch was near the classroom. I want to take this chance given to me!
I finally saw him. Of course he didn't really see me. But danggg it really is him O.O
He still has the same features from 5th grade... and still pretty tall. (Dang... still beat me from 5th grade, I haven't grown since...) HAHA of course... and his hair is slightly different, but I can tell it's still him.
But... I got worried as I peaked at him during lunch. In elementary school he would be able to laugh at anything and was a very cheerful and positive guy... but today he looked pretty down.
Yujin told me that he looked like a social outcast and lonely, which I don't get since... he apparently asked his own date out... 2 weeks before the dance. Apparently that's a sign of liking someone, so he should've at least talked to her.
Well... maybe he just transferred here recent, so he didn't get to know more people. If that's the case I'm willing to be his friend again :) haha
I'm going to take my next chance on Monday, if not I'm going to talk to him during Japanese Club (if I notice him and not be too preoccupied with what's going on in the club).
Haha... (highly possible since apparently I just walked pass him going to the bathroom on Tuesday) Mar might have to help me acknowledge his presence in the room. XD aha...
Well... I love Yujin right now. She's supportive right now. Mar is awesome too in the case, but she has her own problems to deal with as well and I don't want to trouble her with mine since I reached a resolution in less than a week. HAHA
Yujin was completely flattering me. During lunch I told her that Kouhei was right "behind" me kinda outside the Japanese room and she was so eager to check him out.
Haha to see if he's "worthy of me" (so much lying) though... I couldn't help to feel happy when she said that he's pretty good looking. It made me think "YES my judgment in guys isn't completely gullible"
Well I refuse to let this guy take over 2 of my posts so I'm going to talk about anime, friends, and afterschool stuff.
Well... apparently Mar is having problems. She has reached her conclusion, but I think she's taking her conclusion the wrong way.
She makes it sound like she's going to completely give up on Justin... as well as not helping him if he needs a friend to support him.
As I say, "Just be friends, if it works out then it's natural if not, then it might not be meant to be"
Haha... I just hate how it has to be the girl that does all the work... =.= UGHHH HAHA
Hm... well Yujin gave me a preview of my Christmas Card. She said she felt bad for not giving me one last year (being the only one...) and is giving me a super card for christmas.
I'm sooooo excited to see it. I looked at 2 of the (6? 8?) pages that were finished and was amazed at the cover. I LOVED IT! <3
I could almost cry tears on how touched I was... Haha well since it looked like me looking like Tsuna in Hyper mode.
My Nobu being in Hyper mode makes me sooo happy. I refused to read what she had so far so that most of it will be a surprise during christmas. I love surprises, even if I hate waiting for the surprise. HAHA I enjoy the unpredictable? hehe...
She said she wrote a random quote around a page but it just made me feel even happier.
"The generation that surpassed the rest and set an example for future generations...." I can't quite remember it that well, but reading it... I felt completely embedded in the group and that I was truly irreplaceable. I swear if I read it again during Christmas I might cry since I'm so emotional like so XD
I love it when Kimchi draws for me, since it's so pretty and cool and completely different from my style. Ahhhh~ I love her styleeee~ I always get annoyed when she says it's bad... =.=
Well... I love my Vongola 11th character, Sawada Nobuko!
I want to explain my reason for naming her this before I forget.
Well... Iemitsu and Tsunayoshi are both shogun of the Tokugawa era. So... I wanted to see the successor of Tsunayoshi (aka Tsuna). I looked it up and got the name Ienobu, the nephew of Tsunayoshi. Of course... it was a boy name so I took the "Nobu" part and added "Ko" to make it sound more fem. So... My character Nobuko will the be niece of Tsuna (10th Vongola).
Vongola Undecimo! Sawada Nobuko! (do I need an Italian name O.O?) NAHHH!
Well... thanks to Yujin I have an idea myself...
I found this quote: "Chosen ones who have received one of the Vongola rings. Rings that were delivered to people who are worthy of protecting the next Vongola boss Sawada Nobuko." (adding my character's name of course) and I'm going to draw individual pictures.
It's going to be awesome!
Well I have a busy weekend coming up >.< so wish me luck. I'll try to talk about it as the week goes by. Like on Sunday during chinese school or something. XD While Sandra peeks over my shoulder.
Well I got a Chinese test to... so wish me luck!
Japanese Food tomorrow for Dinner! Me ish sooo excited! :3 See ya!
Thursday, October 8, 2009
My Predictions Came True....
Today I went through major shock...
So today was the Boba sale and I volunteered to drive since apparently the group had no one else available to drive, so I volunteered my mom to help me out.
Today was just for experience's sake and to see how Felica carried out the boba sale (so they couldn't use this as something I can't do when I do run for president again)
So... I had quite a few problems with the way they did things... but there's always time for them to improve for them. The process was a little bumpy with the people not know that the Boba was due today... and the cups having problems as well... and... the store being closed when we were there.
They could've improved a lot... but I guess today was the first time Felica did it alone without the help of the former Club Prez and Vice. Well I'm sure she'll do much better, so I'll see next time and not bash her on the internet.
Well... when I was Cafe Tapioca... I was talking to Felica. And suddenly the name Kouhei came up. I suddenly went into shock.
Me: Kouhei?! He... came back?!
Felica: Huh? Came back? What do you mean?
Me: oh... well it's probably not him...
Felica: Wha? Who?
Me: oh... just I knew someone in 5th grade that was name Kouhei... and we were friends and all... do you know his last name?
Felica: Uh... Narron? N - A - R? something like that
Me: 0///0 GASP! -turns away- omg....
Felica: is it him?
Me: yeah... haha... weird... I'm so surprised...
Felica: Yeah... he's a Junior... in AP japanese...
Me: Oh... haha... interesting... -still in shock-
thoughts: Junior?!
Felica: yeah... he asked Mimi to Homecoming
Me: Ahhh~ I see... who's Mimi? -smiles- haha I don't know anyone
Felica: oh... just a friend... I know a lot of people apparently just not well...
Me: Haha... ^^; I see...
The conversation went on... but I can't remember that well since my mind was in a blur after that...
The weird part was we were talking about half asians and how they usually look more white than asian... and I was talking about Kouhei when I said I knew a half asian that looked more Asian...
Quite embarrassing...
I'm in such a shock though... I knew I HAD to talk to my friends since my feelings just overwhelmed as well as disappointed.
First one to know was of course Mar since she was the first to know about him... the Yujin since our promise in 8th grade revealed everything.
I was in such a shock and tried my best to maintain my composure. My mind was screaming for the rest of the day...
I wanted to talk to Marisa and Yujin about it for so long... but there was never the right time and place to do so.
The weird parts are that I thought about this once...
I had a dream about him once... coming back and I talked to him and eventually confessed to him. But... I was rejected since there was some type of obstacle there.
I also wrote in another post here once in "The Past Returns" when I talked about Willie adding me on facebook. I wrote:
Who knew it would actually... >.< AHHHHH~
Bu... well no anime today since I'm going in a drama overflow. I think it's my drama queen side making a big deal again... So I'll try not to go too far. =.=
UGH... I feel like the mixture of Mar, Elora, and Hilary's feelings all at once:
Mar: the decision to keep going or give up
Elora: liking and torn between two people
Hilary: Remember the past with the person
TT^TT I'm such a drama queen I hate itttt~
I would've been better of not knowing me came back. Now it's official that I should give up immediately... I'll try to talk to him as a friend... old childhood friend and see if he remembers me.
What kinda hurt was when Felica said, "yeahh he probably doesn't remember you"
But she might be right. Well I'll see if I can talk to him... what do I say though
"Heyyy Kouhei... I'm Tammy! Remember me from 5th grade? We were friends then... Ms.Sucssle's class! I sat in front of you and we'd always talk that the teacher got mad? Remember? Haha"
Just like that? O.O Haha actually I just might do that... between lunch and 5th period. Just go into AP Japanese... oh... that would be weird too... since his homecoming date is in the same class... and they're probably together...
Will fate give us a chance to be friends?
Haha... TAM... just keep chanting... "It will never happen, it will never happen, don't think about it! friends... friends.."
What I'm sad is that I have a phobia of guys... and it started in 5th grade... after he moved away. I unknowingly declared to stay away from guys... not knowing in high school that's something weird... and it was basically has fault... (can't really blame him)
-ugh... now I can NEVER finish Glass Moon... just too weird...
Cheng's stay single forever! remember!! D<
I will stop ranting because the scroll bar has gotten really small... I'll probably rant about it tomorrow... when I'm not so busy with only 2 hours left to finish hw before tutor O.O SEE YA!
So today was the Boba sale and I volunteered to drive since apparently the group had no one else available to drive, so I volunteered my mom to help me out.
Today was just for experience's sake and to see how Felica carried out the boba sale (so they couldn't use this as something I can't do when I do run for president again)
So... I had quite a few problems with the way they did things... but there's always time for them to improve for them. The process was a little bumpy with the people not know that the Boba was due today... and the cups having problems as well... and... the store being closed when we were there.
They could've improved a lot... but I guess today was the first time Felica did it alone without the help of the former Club Prez and Vice. Well I'm sure she'll do much better, so I'll see next time and not bash her on the internet.
Well... when I was Cafe Tapioca... I was talking to Felica. And suddenly the name Kouhei came up. I suddenly went into shock.
Me: Kouhei?! He... came back?!
Felica: Huh? Came back? What do you mean?
Me: oh... well it's probably not him...
Felica: Wha? Who?
Me: oh... just I knew someone in 5th grade that was name Kouhei... and we were friends and all... do you know his last name?
Felica: Uh... Narron? N - A - R? something like that
Me: 0///0 GASP! -turns away- omg....
Felica: is it him?
Me: yeah... haha... weird... I'm so surprised...
Felica: Yeah... he's a Junior... in AP japanese...
Me: Oh... haha... interesting... -still in shock-
thoughts: Junior?!
Felica: yeah... he asked Mimi to Homecoming
Me: Ahhh~ I see... who's Mimi? -smiles- haha I don't know anyone
Felica: oh... just a friend... I know a lot of people apparently just not well...
Me: Haha... ^^; I see...
The conversation went on... but I can't remember that well since my mind was in a blur after that...
The weird part was we were talking about half asians and how they usually look more white than asian... and I was talking about Kouhei when I said I knew a half asian that looked more Asian...
Quite embarrassing...
I'm in such a shock though... I knew I HAD to talk to my friends since my feelings just overwhelmed as well as disappointed.
First one to know was of course Mar since she was the first to know about him... the Yujin since our promise in 8th grade revealed everything.
I was in such a shock and tried my best to maintain my composure. My mind was screaming for the rest of the day...
I wanted to talk to Marisa and Yujin about it for so long... but there was never the right time and place to do so.
The weird parts are that I thought about this once...
I had a dream about him once... coming back and I talked to him and eventually confessed to him. But... I was rejected since there was some type of obstacle there.
I also wrote in another post here once in "The Past Returns" when I talked about Willie adding me on facebook. I wrote:
Indeed... I seriously hope this isn't a sign that the past WILL return. But then that's not too bad either since then I might see Kouhei again. HAHA... weird of me.
Who knew it would actually... >.< AHHHHH~
Bu... well no anime today since I'm going in a drama overflow. I think it's my drama queen side making a big deal again... So I'll try not to go too far. =.=
UGH... I feel like the mixture of Mar, Elora, and Hilary's feelings all at once:
Mar: the decision to keep going or give up
Elora: liking and torn between two people
Hilary: Remember the past with the person
TT^TT I'm such a drama queen I hate itttt~
I would've been better of not knowing me came back. Now it's official that I should give up immediately... I'll try to talk to him as a friend... old childhood friend and see if he remembers me.
What kinda hurt was when Felica said, "yeahh he probably doesn't remember you"
But she might be right. Well I'll see if I can talk to him... what do I say though
"Heyyy Kouhei... I'm Tammy! Remember me from 5th grade? We were friends then... Ms.Sucssle's class! I sat in front of you and we'd always talk that the teacher got mad? Remember? Haha"
Just like that? O.O Haha actually I just might do that... between lunch and 5th period. Just go into AP Japanese... oh... that would be weird too... since his homecoming date is in the same class... and they're probably together...
Will fate give us a chance to be friends?
Haha... TAM... just keep chanting... "It will never happen, it will never happen, don't think about it! friends... friends.."
What I'm sad is that I have a phobia of guys... and it started in 5th grade... after he moved away. I unknowingly declared to stay away from guys... not knowing in high school that's something weird... and it was basically has fault... (can't really blame him)
-ugh... now I can NEVER finish Glass Moon... just too weird...
Cheng's stay single forever! remember!! D<
I will stop ranting because the scroll bar has gotten really small... I'll probably rant about it tomorrow... when I'm not so busy with only 2 hours left to finish hw before tutor O.O SEE YA!
Saturday, October 3, 2009
OMG Japanese Bingo!
Haha I forgot to add this in my blog for yesterday, but... since it was already so full I was going to (for once) put a short entry.
I was extremely happy during Japanese today.
Today we played Kanji Bingo. It was quite fun. Though I knew I could never win bingo when played in class since I'm always just slightly off.
Well... Today I felt lucky for some reason. I was having great luck with the kanji bingo. I had lots of squares filled in right away and had many possibilities in having a one line bingo.
I was quite excited. But Sonia beat me to it.
Though... on Round 2! The X or + I won with the last square of B金 and finished up the game!
I was so happy. I was always so curious about the taste of the かむかむレメん. It tasted a lot like a softer version of lemon heads. Which was delicious... When I go to japan... I'm going to stock up on おみやげ and cool japanese Candy.
I was really amazed though... for once it was me... not Amy not Kendra, but me... I knew it was probably just a game of luck and chance... but... I felt happy that for once I could be the one to stand out for once.
Well... something strange happened to me today too... Apparently my boiled egg went bad in my lunch box. It was really gross... when I opened my lunch box to get my egg snack, I smelled a strong sour smell. It was so disturbing I was about to puke smelling it.
So I had to throw it away... My sandwich was unaffected, but since it was next to the egg for so long... it started to smell too and I couldn't stand eating it. So... I just ate my orange.
Ugh... but I hate the sour smell that it gives off... I still choke on air when I smell it.
Also... lately Thomas has been hanging around again. He keeps saying that I've been so nice to him.
Well... I guess I was really mean to him I guess. Well... I guess that's now I deal with guys? Since... I'm never comfortable with them... and when one acts like that around me I tend to snap back.
So... He's be saying, "Woah... it's so weird how you're being nice to me now... I'm happy but freaked out at the same time..."
Me: =.= oh... ok...
So that shall be all... now I don't have much of a video today... so I shall leave one for tomorrow. :D
Good Night Peoples.
I was extremely happy during Japanese today.
Today we played Kanji Bingo. It was quite fun. Though I knew I could never win bingo when played in class since I'm always just slightly off.
Well... Today I felt lucky for some reason. I was having great luck with the kanji bingo. I had lots of squares filled in right away and had many possibilities in having a one line bingo.
I was quite excited. But Sonia beat me to it.
Though... on Round 2! The X or + I won with the last square of B金 and finished up the game!
I was so happy. I was always so curious about the taste of the かむかむレメん. It tasted a lot like a softer version of lemon heads. Which was delicious... When I go to japan... I'm going to stock up on おみやげ and cool japanese Candy.
I was really amazed though... for once it was me... not Amy not Kendra, but me... I knew it was probably just a game of luck and chance... but... I felt happy that for once I could be the one to stand out for once.
Well... something strange happened to me today too... Apparently my boiled egg went bad in my lunch box. It was really gross... when I opened my lunch box to get my egg snack, I smelled a strong sour smell. It was so disturbing I was about to puke smelling it.
So I had to throw it away... My sandwich was unaffected, but since it was next to the egg for so long... it started to smell too and I couldn't stand eating it. So... I just ate my orange.
Ugh... but I hate the sour smell that it gives off... I still choke on air when I smell it.
Also... lately Thomas has been hanging around again. He keeps saying that I've been so nice to him.
Well... I guess I was really mean to him I guess. Well... I guess that's now I deal with guys? Since... I'm never comfortable with them... and when one acts like that around me I tend to snap back.
So... He's be saying, "Woah... it's so weird how you're being nice to me now... I'm happy but freaked out at the same time..."
Me: =.= oh... ok...
So that shall be all... now I don't have much of a video today... so I shall leave one for tomorrow. :D
Good Night Peoples.
Friday, October 2, 2009
Closet Raid Dress Up
Today was quite interesting XD
School went by quite quickly. Nothing really ubber great happened and nothing bad happened either. I was looking more forward to my "party" after school Haha.
Well... Afterschool Maru-chan and Kimchi were going to come over and hang oug at my house.
Originally reason was for Mar to come and practice my cello/piano duet thing. But... apparently Marisa did not practice the part at all... so I ended up fooling around with my cello and Yujin went after my violin that was half dead.
So... we decided to leave the instruments alone and laid down on Mr. Bear as a pillow and talked about some problems that seemed to irritate us.
I didn't really share much... since lately, nothing really stresses me. I get worried about my grades, but grades have long been denoted to 3rd most important.
It makes me think that my reformation was quite successful. I've improved myself in my three aspects: Intelligence, Emotional, and Physical. I feel very proud of it all. Though... at times I get tantrums... but I guess that's normal right? Can't be the perfect Mura.Tama 24/7 right?
Ehm... well... after our talk... mostly about Maru's stresses. We suddenly decided to go to my room and see my dresses. Yujin and Mar snuggling into my Full Sized bed as I took out my many dresses. Jeez... I love my bed...
Well... I showed my many dresses to them and they decided to try them on. So... First they took their pick of my dress. I had..... some # of dresses: Black w/ bow, colorful, concert dress, olive dress, Black Sparkle Gold, Promotion dress. And... I think that was all the choices.
So... Round one: Yujin = colorful; Mar = Sparkle Gold
I thought the Sparkle Gold dress suited Mar quite well. She looked very skinny, mature, and pretty.
Yujin looked cute, though... it looked big for her since.... it's my clothes so... of course it would be too big.
Round two: Yujin = black w/ bow; Mar = promotion; Me = Concert
Well technically I changed into my olive dress, then into my concert dress.
All wearing Black. Mafia Girls in Black? XD
Well... Yujin decided she wanted to try on my mom's Aero red fur jacket she saw earlier. Mar looked for some jacket and grabbed my teal jacket (also Aero) and I found my thick black fur jacket. Well... mar felt left out in the jacket thing and I gave her my Blue Aero fur jacket. Then suddenly they were like...
WE SHOULD TAKE PICTURES OF OURSELVES!
I decided we should take it with my laptop since then it would be uploading easier... and all three of us could be in the picture. Well we took some pictures of Formal w/ Fur pictures XD
It was quite fun...
Well after quite many pictures. We decided to do a "Costume Change" and back into my room to see what to wear. Mar decided to wear my clothes (blue plaid summer dress) and I got out my black plaid summer dress. So we became twins!
Yujin was feeling left out... so I grabbed a overshirt that was black plaid (since she was already wear a plain purple shirt).
Resulting in the Plaid Series pictures. Haha (Thought the picture is in Sepia)
For More Pictures... see my Facebook XD
Ehm... so after all the pictures were taken, we decided to eat since my mom was completed with dinner. She made thick noodle soup that Mar and Yujin seemed to enjoy a lot.
Dang... I could only eat one bowl and I was full. I think they ate like... 3 bowls or something. O.O XD haha but I'm glad they liked it. Now they see how I get fat on a normal basis.
Ehm... So... Yujin and I took it upon ourselves to ask Mar if she wanted to join the Hitman Reborn RP that we where to soon start, giving her a basis about the characters and such.
Yujin started looking up some Hitman Reborn Songs... like Sakura Addiction and Kokou no Pride. And... I decided that we could do a duet for Sakura Addiction.
I HAD to show them Yakusoku no Basho~e since... I loved the song. HAHA
Well Yujin had to leave at 7:15 or so... but Mar was allowed to stay until 8:00. Well Mar showed me some 2 pm stuff that I decided that I shall look into since it was... somewhat entertaining.
Quite fun... Well Mar had to leave too and I ended up cleaning up and back on my computer writing this blog.
My question of the day was.... "What cookie dough in the cookie dough fundraiser is better for decorating?"
Most people said sugar cookie or peanut butter, but I thought the might be too plain. So... people told me white chocolate with macadamia. Though... I am worried about what the macadamia might do... (allergies?)
I want to bake my friends cookies for Christmas or something and... since the cookie dough lasts 1 year max. it should all be good if I make the Cookies at Christmas time right?
Haha... well now I need to get decorating materials...
Now that I think about it... I have to deal with the candy canes I give you everyone every year too. XD I probably need another two boxes... I barely had enough last year. O.O should I go up to 3 boxes... >.< HA so scaryyyyy~ Two boxes were so heavy... and I was missing like... 2 or something. Now I know a lot more people (not close but... friends that you know and would like to give something to)
So... Christmas planning starts in November. Now I worry about Mar's Birthday Present, though I already bought it... I suddenly think it's not enough... =,= UGH I'm such a failure... Now... I should go shower since I've been writing this forever already. Tam Out!
School went by quite quickly. Nothing really ubber great happened and nothing bad happened either. I was looking more forward to my "party" after school Haha.
Well... Afterschool Maru-chan and Kimchi were going to come over and hang oug at my house.
Originally reason was for Mar to come and practice my cello/piano duet thing. But... apparently Marisa did not practice the part at all... so I ended up fooling around with my cello and Yujin went after my violin that was half dead.
So... we decided to leave the instruments alone and laid down on Mr. Bear as a pillow and talked about some problems that seemed to irritate us.
I didn't really share much... since lately, nothing really stresses me. I get worried about my grades, but grades have long been denoted to 3rd most important.
It makes me think that my reformation was quite successful. I've improved myself in my three aspects: Intelligence, Emotional, and Physical. I feel very proud of it all. Though... at times I get tantrums... but I guess that's normal right? Can't be the perfect Mura.Tama 24/7 right?
Ehm... well... after our talk... mostly about Maru's stresses. We suddenly decided to go to my room and see my dresses. Yujin and Mar snuggling into my Full Sized bed as I took out my many dresses. Jeez... I love my bed...
Well... I showed my many dresses to them and they decided to try them on. So... First they took their pick of my dress. I had..... some # of dresses: Black w/ bow, colorful, concert dress, olive dress, Black Sparkle Gold, Promotion dress. And... I think that was all the choices.
So... Round one: Yujin = colorful; Mar = Sparkle Gold
I thought the Sparkle Gold dress suited Mar quite well. She looked very skinny, mature, and pretty.
Yujin looked cute, though... it looked big for her since.... it's my clothes so... of course it would be too big.
Round two: Yujin = black w/ bow; Mar = promotion; Me = Concert
Well technically I changed into my olive dress, then into my concert dress.
All wearing Black. Mafia Girls in Black? XD
Well... Yujin decided she wanted to try on my mom's Aero red fur jacket she saw earlier. Mar looked for some jacket and grabbed my teal jacket (also Aero) and I found my thick black fur jacket. Well... mar felt left out in the jacket thing and I gave her my Blue Aero fur jacket. Then suddenly they were like...
WE SHOULD TAKE PICTURES OF OURSELVES!
I decided we should take it with my laptop since then it would be uploading easier... and all three of us could be in the picture. Well we took some pictures of Formal w/ Fur pictures XD
It was quite fun...
Well after quite many pictures. We decided to do a "Costume Change" and back into my room to see what to wear. Mar decided to wear my clothes (blue plaid summer dress) and I got out my black plaid summer dress. So we became twins!
Yujin was feeling left out... so I grabbed a overshirt that was black plaid (since she was already wear a plain purple shirt).
Resulting in the Plaid Series pictures. Haha (Thought the picture is in Sepia)
For More Pictures... see my Facebook XD
Ehm... so after all the pictures were taken, we decided to eat since my mom was completed with dinner. She made thick noodle soup that Mar and Yujin seemed to enjoy a lot.
Dang... I could only eat one bowl and I was full. I think they ate like... 3 bowls or something. O.O XD haha but I'm glad they liked it. Now they see how I get fat on a normal basis.
Ehm... So... Yujin and I took it upon ourselves to ask Mar if she wanted to join the Hitman Reborn RP that we where to soon start, giving her a basis about the characters and such.
Yujin started looking up some Hitman Reborn Songs... like Sakura Addiction and Kokou no Pride. And... I decided that we could do a duet for Sakura Addiction.
I HAD to show them Yakusoku no Basho~e since... I loved the song. HAHA
Well Yujin had to leave at 7:15 or so... but Mar was allowed to stay until 8:00. Well Mar showed me some 2 pm stuff that I decided that I shall look into since it was... somewhat entertaining.
Quite fun... Well Mar had to leave too and I ended up cleaning up and back on my computer writing this blog.
My question of the day was.... "What cookie dough in the cookie dough fundraiser is better for decorating?"
Most people said sugar cookie or peanut butter, but I thought the might be too plain. So... people told me white chocolate with macadamia. Though... I am worried about what the macadamia might do... (allergies?)
I want to bake my friends cookies for Christmas or something and... since the cookie dough lasts 1 year max. it should all be good if I make the Cookies at Christmas time right?
Haha... well now I need to get decorating materials...
Now that I think about it... I have to deal with the candy canes I give you everyone every year too. XD I probably need another two boxes... I barely had enough last year. O.O should I go up to 3 boxes... >.< HA so scaryyyyy~ Two boxes were so heavy... and I was missing like... 2 or something. Now I know a lot more people (not close but... friends that you know and would like to give something to)
So... Christmas planning starts in November. Now I worry about Mar's Birthday Present, though I already bought it... I suddenly think it's not enough... =,= UGH I'm such a failure... Now... I should go shower since I've been writing this forever already. Tam Out!
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
School Loyalities?
I finally managed to get some time to write a post about the last two days... so just today and yesterday.
Well the Topic of yesterday is that apparently I'm back in the Japanese Club. I really want to be in this club, but I just hate how it's under the wrong type of management.
I want to change the club from the inside, and for me to do that, I have to face the current heads of the club.
So now... I need to be accepted into their group and turn out to be a worthwhile candidate for the Japanese Club President before Senior year. This year's goal is become a worthy role as Vice.
There are two things I need to accomplish:
1. To learn the way to carry out the boba fundraisers and how to deal with office paperwork
2. Gain the trust of the current Prez and the Vice.
This week I volunteered to ask my mom to do the boba pick up, since no one else can do it.
I need to get them to trust that I can be supportive of this club. It won't matter that I'm not part of their group if I become a better candidate and is better involved in the club.
I hope my friends support me in my determination. I'm fighting this my own, so I hope my friends will give me their encouragement during my mission. HAHA
Haaaa... well today in Orchestra, we started another cookie dough fundraiser...
Seriously... I think they should think of something other than cookie dough.
Though... now I'm trying my best to sell it. Since there's quite a chunk of people I know who are not in orchestra, so I can always ask them XD
$10 is pretty cheap for cookie dough... Everyone says it's expensive... but the elementary school cookie dough fundraisers is like.... $16.
Well... if they sold cake... I'm sure they would gain a huge profit from my family... My mom loves cake... like me XD haha... and churros as well. Frozen churros is also what my mom loves. She bought 5 boxes of it during the 5th grade outdoor ed fundraiser. LOL
Er... so lately I guess I want to be involved and so more good for the school. I'm probably going to join F.I.S.H Club and pick up trash tomorrow. I even brought some plastic gloves for safety and hygienic reasons. I brought a pair for Hilary, Mar, and Kimchi too if they would like it.
Well Homecoming in... 3 weeks or so?
Though... my mom's pretty excited about it... Even though I'm the one who's going. Yesterday we were going through my dresses (that are put on standby in my closet) and trying them on... adding accessories.
Ended up picking my olive green dress with a black inner shirt to match my shoes. It was... tiring... I really hate changing in and out of clothes. It's just gets me really tired, especially on a hot day.
Ehm... What else was I thinking about. Oh! apparent there's a party at my house tomorrow XD
First it was going to be a playdate with Kimchi. Then Mar says she wanted to come over so we could practice my cello/piano duet thing... then other people wanted to come too. And I'm guessing it's becoming party :D not that I mind... but it's more like business me and mar need to take care of... so I hope we don't get too off task.
Ehm... well continuing in with my otaku lifestyle!
Hitman Reborn still going strong. Though. I can't quench the thirst, so the need is starting to die off. But I still love it! and I can have a very intellectual conversation about Hitman Reborn. HAHA
I think looking at the numbers now... we should start the Hitman Reborn RP soon, before the love dies off. Hilary has started the anime and I'm guessing she likes it... I have trouble confirming it. Elora has agreed to watch it and now she just needs to carry out the action. Marisa would be a little harder to convince since her life is so Korean filled that anime really isn't something she wants to spend her free time on... =.= TT^TT
Well... I hope we start the RP soon. I'm looking forward to it :D HAHA well that should be all for today!
Now time for the Vids!
Long Missed HETALIA VID!
And... Of course. The Hitman Reborn Vid of the Day :D
Well the Topic of yesterday is that apparently I'm back in the Japanese Club. I really want to be in this club, but I just hate how it's under the wrong type of management.
I want to change the club from the inside, and for me to do that, I have to face the current heads of the club.
So now... I need to be accepted into their group and turn out to be a worthwhile candidate for the Japanese Club President before Senior year. This year's goal is become a worthy role as Vice.
There are two things I need to accomplish:
1. To learn the way to carry out the boba fundraisers and how to deal with office paperwork
2. Gain the trust of the current Prez and the Vice.
This week I volunteered to ask my mom to do the boba pick up, since no one else can do it.
I need to get them to trust that I can be supportive of this club. It won't matter that I'm not part of their group if I become a better candidate and is better involved in the club.
I hope my friends support me in my determination. I'm fighting this my own, so I hope my friends will give me their encouragement during my mission. HAHA
Haaaa... well today in Orchestra, we started another cookie dough fundraiser...
Seriously... I think they should think of something other than cookie dough.
Though... now I'm trying my best to sell it. Since there's quite a chunk of people I know who are not in orchestra, so I can always ask them XD
$10 is pretty cheap for cookie dough... Everyone says it's expensive... but the elementary school cookie dough fundraisers is like.... $16.
Well... if they sold cake... I'm sure they would gain a huge profit from my family... My mom loves cake... like me XD haha... and churros as well. Frozen churros is also what my mom loves. She bought 5 boxes of it during the 5th grade outdoor ed fundraiser. LOL
Er... so lately I guess I want to be involved and so more good for the school. I'm probably going to join F.I.S.H Club and pick up trash tomorrow. I even brought some plastic gloves for safety and hygienic reasons. I brought a pair for Hilary, Mar, and Kimchi too if they would like it.
Well Homecoming in... 3 weeks or so?
Though... my mom's pretty excited about it... Even though I'm the one who's going. Yesterday we were going through my dresses (that are put on standby in my closet) and trying them on... adding accessories.
Ended up picking my olive green dress with a black inner shirt to match my shoes. It was... tiring... I really hate changing in and out of clothes. It's just gets me really tired, especially on a hot day.
Ehm... What else was I thinking about. Oh! apparent there's a party at my house tomorrow XD
First it was going to be a playdate with Kimchi. Then Mar says she wanted to come over so we could practice my cello/piano duet thing... then other people wanted to come too. And I'm guessing it's becoming party :D not that I mind... but it's more like business me and mar need to take care of... so I hope we don't get too off task.
Ehm... well continuing in with my otaku lifestyle!
Hitman Reborn still going strong. Though. I can't quench the thirst, so the need is starting to die off. But I still love it! and I can have a very intellectual conversation about Hitman Reborn. HAHA
I think looking at the numbers now... we should start the Hitman Reborn RP soon, before the love dies off. Hilary has started the anime and I'm guessing she likes it... I have trouble confirming it. Elora has agreed to watch it and now she just needs to carry out the action. Marisa would be a little harder to convince since her life is so Korean filled that anime really isn't something she wants to spend her free time on... =.= TT^TT
Well... I hope we start the RP soon. I'm looking forward to it :D HAHA well that should be all for today!
Now time for the Vids!
Long Missed HETALIA VID!
And... Of course. The Hitman Reborn Vid of the Day :D
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Lollipop - Sorry Sorry XD
LOL today I watched a heck hilarious video as I was looking at Bang Bang Tang videos and trying to jump on the popular wagon of popular music.
here it is! :D
WangZhi and Aoquan (Prince & Owodog) with their skit and dance SORRY SORRY XDDD
Ahhh I love them XD Best duet of Lollipop eva! X3
LOL well that was pretty much the highlight of my day. Thanks to these two... I now love the song "Sorry Sorry" XDDD lol
Before you know it I'll be dancing it too XD ahahaha <3
Ok.... well... now I'm pretty much stressing out about my chinese homework... AHHHH~
I have to write a whole essay about Confucius in Chinese?!
Ahhh... this is when technology has to help me...
I only wrote about a paragraph. I hope it counts as an "essay"
ERrrr well I probably should get some more homework done... >.< since... I have lots of those assignments that'll spark my imagination and take me forever to finish...
Er... well today I was procrastinating and decided to look up myself on google. Unfortunately apparently... I don't exist O.O
Marisa seems to exist but the age listed was wrong. 49.... and.... there was a Marisa L Chan in Pleasanton O.O but I don't think that's my Maru-Chan, though it's still kinda freaky.
There was a possible Yujin Choi since... there was a Daniel Choi as a relative (quite possible though...) but the cities were all wrong
Hilary is the only Hilary Tsai in California. and I'm pretty positive it was her since her parents are listed in the "relatives" section and the address is Pleasanton, Califorina.
There is no Elora Kelsh in California at all, though I know one. lol
And there are so many Jessica Chengs that I got too lazy to see which one... and I didn't know any of the chinese names of her relatives anyways...
So... that is the status of my boredom and time wasting.
Well. Hitman Reborn is still going strong. I'm wondering if Yujin wants to start the RP so I can start my role.
I'm very happy that Hilary has decided that she is bored enough to watch Hitman Reborn and Elora decided to watch it but now needs to make the time between school and soccer.
Yep yep... what else...
I ate sushi today. I'm so un-asian, I love the American sushi like the California Roll and Shrimp Tempura Roll. Though I LOVE sashimi, I guess that makes up for it? X3
loll indeed...
Well... my mom is on a skinny jean buying rage. She bought me two more pairs. She's been so happy that I lost 12 pounds or so... since... now I wear bikinis and skinny jeans and not have to look like the type of girl that wears clothes too small for her and start looking hecka gross.
Ehm... well my cake drawing is going good. My teachers says it looks good enough to eat and I know I've almost fulfilled my purpose for this art project X3
I got home and remembered to collect some pennies for Hilary's church competition/donation for a good cause thing. I collected exactly 100 pennies out of all the places I could find coins in my house. Probably 20 of them were from my coin box, wallet, and from the jars full of my random stuff that I can use again. loll
50 was most likely from my dad's gambling penny storage. But that was the old days when he didn't care about his health and went gambling to eat buffets, so I did him a favor and added it to my collection.
The rest most likely came from random hunting. The drawers, the tables, the laundry, and more in my room. As you see... I really hate pennies Ahaha. So Thank you Hilary for giving me this chance to get rid of all these pennies.
LOL ehm... well... Today I decided to add my cousin Andy and Kim onto my facebook account for stalking purposes. Quite fun. Andy already accepted me as a friend and I was quite happy. He's totally awesome XD haha I love him
I'm not sure if Kim will be willing to add her baby cousin onto her facebook where I can see all her info and social life in college. But by the looks of it, she doesn't go on facebook that much. She doesn't even have a profile picture up... maybe for security purposes? since that sounds a bit like Kim indeed....
OK... soo... As for my anime life... It's been pretty much on a downlow lately... very weird desho? Storing up for a more excitement later in life?
Haha... well of course I have videos! What do you think I do when I'm procrastinating on HW
here it is! :D
WangZhi and Aoquan (Prince & Owodog) with their skit and dance SORRY SORRY XDDD
Ahhh I love them XD Best duet of Lollipop eva! X3
LOL well that was pretty much the highlight of my day. Thanks to these two... I now love the song "Sorry Sorry" XDDD lol
Before you know it I'll be dancing it too XD ahahaha <3
Ok.... well... now I'm pretty much stressing out about my chinese homework... AHHHH~
I have to write a whole essay about Confucius in Chinese?!
Ahhh... this is when technology has to help me...
I only wrote about a paragraph. I hope it counts as an "essay"
ERrrr well I probably should get some more homework done... >.< since... I have lots of those assignments that'll spark my imagination and take me forever to finish...
Er... well today I was procrastinating and decided to look up myself on google. Unfortunately apparently... I don't exist O.O
Marisa seems to exist but the age listed was wrong. 49.... and.... there was a Marisa L Chan in Pleasanton O.O but I don't think that's my Maru-Chan, though it's still kinda freaky.
There was a possible Yujin Choi since... there was a Daniel Choi as a relative (quite possible though...) but the cities were all wrong
Hilary is the only Hilary Tsai in California. and I'm pretty positive it was her since her parents are listed in the "relatives" section and the address is Pleasanton, Califorina.
There is no Elora Kelsh in California at all, though I know one. lol
And there are so many Jessica Chengs that I got too lazy to see which one... and I didn't know any of the chinese names of her relatives anyways...
So... that is the status of my boredom and time wasting.
Well. Hitman Reborn is still going strong. I'm wondering if Yujin wants to start the RP so I can start my role.
I'm very happy that Hilary has decided that she is bored enough to watch Hitman Reborn and Elora decided to watch it but now needs to make the time between school and soccer.
Yep yep... what else...
I ate sushi today. I'm so un-asian, I love the American sushi like the California Roll and Shrimp Tempura Roll. Though I LOVE sashimi, I guess that makes up for it? X3
loll indeed...
Well... my mom is on a skinny jean buying rage. She bought me two more pairs. She's been so happy that I lost 12 pounds or so... since... now I wear bikinis and skinny jeans and not have to look like the type of girl that wears clothes too small for her and start looking hecka gross.
Ehm... well my cake drawing is going good. My teachers says it looks good enough to eat and I know I've almost fulfilled my purpose for this art project X3
I got home and remembered to collect some pennies for Hilary's church competition/donation for a good cause thing. I collected exactly 100 pennies out of all the places I could find coins in my house. Probably 20 of them were from my coin box, wallet, and from the jars full of my random stuff that I can use again. loll
50 was most likely from my dad's gambling penny storage. But that was the old days when he didn't care about his health and went gambling to eat buffets, so I did him a favor and added it to my collection.
The rest most likely came from random hunting. The drawers, the tables, the laundry, and more in my room. As you see... I really hate pennies Ahaha. So Thank you Hilary for giving me this chance to get rid of all these pennies.
LOL ehm... well... Today I decided to add my cousin Andy and Kim onto my facebook account for stalking purposes. Quite fun. Andy already accepted me as a friend and I was quite happy. He's totally awesome XD haha I love him
I'm not sure if Kim will be willing to add her baby cousin onto her facebook where I can see all her info and social life in college. But by the looks of it, she doesn't go on facebook that much. She doesn't even have a profile picture up... maybe for security purposes? since that sounds a bit like Kim indeed....
OK... soo... As for my anime life... It's been pretty much on a downlow lately... very weird desho? Storing up for a more excitement later in life?
Haha... well of course I have videos! What do you think I do when I'm procrastinating on HW
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Drawing Excitement
The activity that took over most of my weekend today was my addiction to drawing and art related forms... I've also started a bit of graphic designing again.
Well... my drawings this weekend were centered around two main themes: Characters in Suits for the Vongola family and Formal Wear Drawing as presents.
Here are some descriptions of the Vongola family Project:
Well... it all started with Yujin and her goal in getting all of us the "eleventh" generation of Vongola to start an RP with our friends in their Vongola roles with a character (of course) representing them.
I thought it was an awesome idea, and this is how the Vongola family project sparked up.
Well so far I've only drawn Hilary and Myself since... Hilary was the only other person I could gather information from how she would like her representation to look.
Well the RP thing is the more important idea. I think it would be fun to make a story type of thing and thinking about it... I think it's ok that everyone else doesn't know what in the world Hitman Reborn is... since... then it's like their characters are learning about this "fantasy" world along with the actual people with Yujin and me in control.
I've managed to get Hilary to agree doing this and I'm pretty excited. Since... we don't need EVERYONE right away, but just sooner or later wouldn't be bad either. Since... the family can grow slowly. But then... what do we do about our missing guardian? O.O unless we end up having to switch up the roles again... since then the roles and friendship relations actually make more sense...
Hm... continuing onnnn~ The Birthday Formal Wear drawings?
Well there's not much of a story behind it... I just found this awesome picture with a bunch of Hetalia characters in suits and the poses were just beautiful, so I had to try out drawing guys. So... I drew something for Mar (got to collect bit of info from her) and Hilary :D and but drawings are finished. Now it's time to wait for their birthday until their appearance... but I think my partner in drawing gets to see it too :D.
Hm... ok then... Graphic Designing...
Well yeah... my mom is making me create more graphics for her Taiwanese e-bay website for her Coach bags... So... since she bought something online for me. I'll have to figure out how to make animated slideshow gifs and manage to post it online....
This is going to be difficult.
Well I'll try to figure it out somehow... I might need to do more animated GIFs research.
Yep yep... well I bought my Vongola Rings set of 7! and... I'm hoping their now too big... >.> and I hope the sky ring's gem doesn't jut out (but since it's round that's fine...)
Well... I'm quite excited to receive them :D I seriously can't wait! I'm such an otaku... but proud of it! just not proud about fangirling in front of my friends about it.
Hm... well that's pretty much all I've been doing all week....
I'm probably going to need to collect info from Elora, Jessica, Yujin, and Mar about their Vongola counterparts at school since they're never online... =.= well that's ok... I'll deal with it somehow...
Ok... well the Vid of this Weekend
Well I almost cried watching this... the end...
Just seeing the expressions of the others at Tsuna's funeral :'( sad....
But... it was very well drawn... and Chrome looks so... feminine... amazing what 10 years can do XD
OK thennnnnn~
Song of the Weekend: "88" by LMC
Pix of the Weekend: Suits?
Answer: YES I LOVE SUITS >D lolll
Uh... and... I think that's all :D
School tomorrow so time to hit the bed, see ya!
Well... my drawings this weekend were centered around two main themes: Characters in Suits for the Vongola family and Formal Wear Drawing as presents.
Here are some descriptions of the Vongola family Project:
Well... it all started with Yujin and her goal in getting all of us the "eleventh" generation of Vongola to start an RP with our friends in their Vongola roles with a character (of course) representing them.
I thought it was an awesome idea, and this is how the Vongola family project sparked up.
Well so far I've only drawn Hilary and Myself since... Hilary was the only other person I could gather information from how she would like her representation to look.
Well the RP thing is the more important idea. I think it would be fun to make a story type of thing and thinking about it... I think it's ok that everyone else doesn't know what in the world Hitman Reborn is... since... then it's like their characters are learning about this "fantasy" world along with the actual people with Yujin and me in control.
I've managed to get Hilary to agree doing this and I'm pretty excited. Since... we don't need EVERYONE right away, but just sooner or later wouldn't be bad either. Since... the family can grow slowly. But then... what do we do about our missing guardian? O.O unless we end up having to switch up the roles again... since then the roles and friendship relations actually make more sense...
Hm... continuing onnnn~ The Birthday Formal Wear drawings?
Well there's not much of a story behind it... I just found this awesome picture with a bunch of Hetalia characters in suits and the poses were just beautiful, so I had to try out drawing guys. So... I drew something for Mar (got to collect bit of info from her) and Hilary :D and but drawings are finished. Now it's time to wait for their birthday until their appearance... but I think my partner in drawing gets to see it too :D.
Hm... ok then... Graphic Designing...
Well yeah... my mom is making me create more graphics for her Taiwanese e-bay website for her Coach bags... So... since she bought something online for me. I'll have to figure out how to make animated slideshow gifs and manage to post it online....
This is going to be difficult.
Well I'll try to figure it out somehow... I might need to do more animated GIFs research.
Yep yep... well I bought my Vongola Rings set of 7! and... I'm hoping their now too big... >.> and I hope the sky ring's gem doesn't jut out (but since it's round that's fine...)
Well... I'm quite excited to receive them :D I seriously can't wait! I'm such an otaku... but proud of it! just not proud about fangirling in front of my friends about it.
Hm... well that's pretty much all I've been doing all week....
I'm probably going to need to collect info from Elora, Jessica, Yujin, and Mar about their Vongola counterparts at school since they're never online... =.= well that's ok... I'll deal with it somehow...
Ok... well the Vid of this Weekend
Well I almost cried watching this... the end...
Just seeing the expressions of the others at Tsuna's funeral :'( sad....
But... it was very well drawn... and Chrome looks so... feminine... amazing what 10 years can do XD
OK thennnnnn~
Song of the Weekend: "88" by LMC
Pix of the Weekend: Suits?
Answer: YES I LOVE SUITS >D lolll
Uh... and... I think that's all :D
School tomorrow so time to hit the bed, see ya!
Friday, September 18, 2009
Road to Enlightenment
Today has been quite a good day. Nothing really bad happened so it was nice.
The first thing good was from school surprisingly. First it was the drawing/poster test from History. It was AWESOME I totally had tons of fun.
So what we were suppose to do was to draw out representations or what happened for each topic we were given.
3 topics were given to every person and you were to draw it out.
I never thought I would ever say this in my LIFE. But that was the funnest? test I've ever taken!
I do hope Ms.Dennis gives us more of these types of test. I think I can really love Honors World History. Haha...
Hm... well another fun thing was during strings. Mr. Nishimori told us to sing the parts unless you had ... a specific rhythm, so everyone was sing it. Haha... Curtis was a lovely singer indeed. XD
It was priceless. CHOIR! I enjoyed that quite a lot actually. I'd be willing to sing the parts anytime. HAHA
Well... today afterschool, I was apparently going to Falcon Fest so I went to Yujin's house to wait for Elora to come and join us so we all walk over to school. So I hung out with Yujin as I asked her about her "original" characters and got some interesting stories of hers. As expected of the very creative character creator, Kimchi! Haha...
Well... after a while Elora came as we talked about Hitman Reborn and we're both trying to get Elora started with the series since she is "Mukuro/Chrome." So I hope she starts it soon! Then she'll know what to buy me when she goes to fanime! >D
LOL Well after Yujin and Elora's time was almost up, we walked to Foothill to hang out at Falcon Fest. I was quite interested in what was there, but it felt awkward getting excited and starting to look around to the other booths.
Though... some food items interested me since... I was hungry...
So... In the end I bought a snow cone (from the golf team) and a froyo blush ice cream.
Today was the first time I tried a blush froyo and it was different from what I expected. It was good indeed, but... I don't see why it's so good that it's almost "to die for" though... it tasted like the Yogurt drink that I get in the small bottles at the Asian markets. The tangy milky taste... the taste I wasn't quite fond of as a kid. XD
Though... it was interesting.. I was deciding if I wanted a churro, but it seems Yujin and Elora had to leave soon, so I decided to save my gluttony. It was also a bit awkward to buy something from those two stands since they pretty much attacked Yujin about buying which thing while she held my wallet...
It was kinda awkward to buy something from both of them... ugh... just thinking about it makes me hungry.
To continue on, Yujin was pretty much late for Taekwondo, so I guess her family left without her. That seems to be Kimchi's life story. Well.. since we were pretty much locked out, not sure where my backpack was, so we decided to wait in front of her house to see when her parents will be coming home.
The conversation flowed well this time. It wasn't the awkward, not sure what to say thing, but it flowed on. Like... it started off about talking about anime in general (switching back and forth from Hitman Reborn), then it started going into original characters for Hitman Reborn, then it started to go into our true friend roles.
This conversation was actually pretty interesting. It allowed the two of us to analyze the true "meanings" of our friendship.
So... we talked about the roles of our friendship. Like... who was the one who unites everyone, the "offense", the "defense", the "tranquilizer", the "activator", the solitary one, and the "masked" one.
Even though our "Vongola Ring" roles were already decided, this conversation was rearranging it. Though, it was just our thoughts, I think Kimchi's pretty comfortable as cloud guardian.
Well the other choice we had for the roles shall be listed below (based on personality):
Sky: Tammy (me, apparently... I still don't get why) - the one who "unites"
Storm: Yujin - "offense"
Rain: Elora - the calm one
Cloud: (missing role)
Mist: Hilary
Thunder: Marisa
Sun: Jessica
Apparently once again we're missing another role. Since... Surti didn't work out too well and Yujin is trying to convince me to accept Allyson. But... I don't know here that well, so I'm a bit unsure.
Well... afterwards I told Yujin the reason for my "reform" during the summer and why I decided that I had to reform myself. This all led up to the TALK that was bothering us for a while. Though this time was a lot better since I think both of us has had enough time to think about it.
Yujin actually shared a lot of stuff that helped solve some things I was worrying about.
Up till even today I have no idea what our main problem was. I guess it was that we didn't know how the other felt. I can't really put my finger on it anyways.
Though... I think this talk went a lot smoother than others, since... we lead up to the "talk" naturally and it was easier to talk things out.
I guess it was a pretty good day.
Vid of this Week! er... well I couldn't find a vid for this week sadly... so... here's a Tsuna tribute AMV I thought looked nice
haha yayyy
Well some randomness
Song of the Day: Yakusoku no Bashou e (the promised land) by Reborn! cast
Quote of the Day: "I can be in Hypermode when I'm Hyper! :D" ~Tammy
The first thing good was from school surprisingly. First it was the drawing/poster test from History. It was AWESOME I totally had tons of fun.
So what we were suppose to do was to draw out representations or what happened for each topic we were given.
3 topics were given to every person and you were to draw it out.
I never thought I would ever say this in my LIFE. But that was the funnest? test I've ever taken!
I do hope Ms.Dennis gives us more of these types of test. I think I can really love Honors World History. Haha...
Hm... well another fun thing was during strings. Mr. Nishimori told us to sing the parts unless you had ... a specific rhythm, so everyone was sing it. Haha... Curtis was a lovely singer indeed. XD
It was priceless. CHOIR! I enjoyed that quite a lot actually. I'd be willing to sing the parts anytime. HAHA
Well... today afterschool, I was apparently going to Falcon Fest so I went to Yujin's house to wait for Elora to come and join us so we all walk over to school. So I hung out with Yujin as I asked her about her "original" characters and got some interesting stories of hers. As expected of the very creative character creator, Kimchi! Haha...
Well... after a while Elora came as we talked about Hitman Reborn and we're both trying to get Elora started with the series since she is "Mukuro/Chrome." So I hope she starts it soon! Then she'll know what to buy me when she goes to fanime! >D
LOL Well after Yujin and Elora's time was almost up, we walked to Foothill to hang out at Falcon Fest. I was quite interested in what was there, but it felt awkward getting excited and starting to look around to the other booths.
Though... some food items interested me since... I was hungry...
So... In the end I bought a snow cone (from the golf team) and a froyo blush ice cream.
Today was the first time I tried a blush froyo and it was different from what I expected. It was good indeed, but... I don't see why it's so good that it's almost "to die for" though... it tasted like the Yogurt drink that I get in the small bottles at the Asian markets. The tangy milky taste... the taste I wasn't quite fond of as a kid. XD
Though... it was interesting.. I was deciding if I wanted a churro, but it seems Yujin and Elora had to leave soon, so I decided to save my gluttony. It was also a bit awkward to buy something from those two stands since they pretty much attacked Yujin about buying which thing while she held my wallet...
It was kinda awkward to buy something from both of them... ugh... just thinking about it makes me hungry.
To continue on, Yujin was pretty much late for Taekwondo, so I guess her family left without her. That seems to be Kimchi's life story. Well.. since we were pretty much locked out, not sure where my backpack was, so we decided to wait in front of her house to see when her parents will be coming home.
The conversation flowed well this time. It wasn't the awkward, not sure what to say thing, but it flowed on. Like... it started off about talking about anime in general (switching back and forth from Hitman Reborn), then it started going into original characters for Hitman Reborn, then it started to go into our true friend roles.
This conversation was actually pretty interesting. It allowed the two of us to analyze the true "meanings" of our friendship.
So... we talked about the roles of our friendship. Like... who was the one who unites everyone, the "offense", the "defense", the "tranquilizer", the "activator", the solitary one, and the "masked" one.
Even though our "Vongola Ring" roles were already decided, this conversation was rearranging it. Though, it was just our thoughts, I think Kimchi's pretty comfortable as cloud guardian.
Well the other choice we had for the roles shall be listed below (based on personality):
Sky: Tammy (me, apparently... I still don't get why) - the one who "unites"
Storm: Yujin - "offense"
Rain: Elora - the calm one
Cloud: (missing role)
Mist: Hilary
Thunder: Marisa
Sun: Jessica
Apparently once again we're missing another role. Since... Surti didn't work out too well and Yujin is trying to convince me to accept Allyson. But... I don't know here that well, so I'm a bit unsure.
Well... afterwards I told Yujin the reason for my "reform" during the summer and why I decided that I had to reform myself. This all led up to the TALK that was bothering us for a while. Though this time was a lot better since I think both of us has had enough time to think about it.
Yujin actually shared a lot of stuff that helped solve some things I was worrying about.
Up till even today I have no idea what our main problem was. I guess it was that we didn't know how the other felt. I can't really put my finger on it anyways.
Though... I think this talk went a lot smoother than others, since... we lead up to the "talk" naturally and it was easier to talk things out.
I guess it was a pretty good day.
Vid of this Week! er... well I couldn't find a vid for this week sadly... so... here's a Tsuna tribute AMV I thought looked nice
haha yayyy
Well some randomness
Song of the Day: Yakusoku no Bashou e (the promised land) by Reborn! cast
Quote of the Day: "I can be in Hypermode when I'm Hyper! :D" ~Tammy
Monday, September 14, 2009
Where's my Voice?!
Ugh... today was a day of pure torture. I got sick last night and I decided to take some medicine before the symptoms got worse. But oddly once I too the medicine I felt even worse.
I think I've become immune to Tylenol, since... I can't taste the bitterness anymore (since I can't swallow pills) and such. But my grandma bought me this cough medicine... it's SO BITTER! I always need to eat something sweet each time I take it. I hate it >.<
It doesn't dissolve in hot water either, so I have to bit it so it's a size where I can somewhat swallow it, but then the bitterness lingers on my teeth and I just feel like throwing up.
I hate getting sick, though I knew it was coming, since last year was my year or immunity. So this year I suffer from getting sick.
But this sickness is worse than my normal flu. This time my throat hurts so badly and my head pulses and such. I couldn't sleep last night because I felt like I was being choked in my sleep. Scary right?
Ugh... I lost my voice this afternoon. My parents were laughing at me since I couldn't say anything. I was like yelling and there was no sound. Haha it was kind of funny.
I managed to regain some voice so now it's at whisper volume to talking soft level after 3 bowls of my FAV corn soup.
Everyone's telling me I should sleep early. Indeed that's something I know, but I always want to watch more anime and dramas and what not. XD wooo! since I'm Tam, so nothing can get in the way of my anime, not even a life-threatening illness.
Hm... well speaking of my dramas and what not. I feel like I have a shota-complex. I noticed I like guys that look like kids... or have a childish look to them. <3 So cuteee~
One example is my newly discovered Japanese model/actor, Kanata Hongo.
I go slight fangirl-mode at pictures of him. So cuteee~ even though he's like 19 years old he looks like a middle-schooler. Eto... completely different from my Tachi, but similar to my current interest -blush-
Here's a Hetalia "live-action" cast video. Completely fanmade, but Kanata Hongo was chosen to be Japan/Kiku. Hahahahaaaa Kawaiii~ <3
Ugh... well lately I haven't been finding much Hitman Reborn videos that I really liked to be put here, so I guess I will have to settle with more Hetalia stuff.
Here's the awesome video that all Hetalia fans know of because if it's beautiful animation <3 Totally awesome
Yeah... and this was just an awesome cosplay skit I've ever seen for Hetalia
Another Thing
Apparently Justin is going to homecomming with Kristen, dangggg I'm going to get left behind when it comes to relationships. Haha XD
Must be my otakuness that gets in the way. Well not that mind.
I think I've become immune to Tylenol, since... I can't taste the bitterness anymore (since I can't swallow pills) and such. But my grandma bought me this cough medicine... it's SO BITTER! I always need to eat something sweet each time I take it. I hate it >.<
It doesn't dissolve in hot water either, so I have to bit it so it's a size where I can somewhat swallow it, but then the bitterness lingers on my teeth and I just feel like throwing up.
I hate getting sick, though I knew it was coming, since last year was my year or immunity. So this year I suffer from getting sick.
But this sickness is worse than my normal flu. This time my throat hurts so badly and my head pulses and such. I couldn't sleep last night because I felt like I was being choked in my sleep. Scary right?
Ugh... I lost my voice this afternoon. My parents were laughing at me since I couldn't say anything. I was like yelling and there was no sound. Haha it was kind of funny.
I managed to regain some voice so now it's at whisper volume to talking soft level after 3 bowls of my FAV corn soup.
Everyone's telling me I should sleep early. Indeed that's something I know, but I always want to watch more anime and dramas and what not. XD wooo! since I'm Tam, so nothing can get in the way of my anime, not even a life-threatening illness.
Hm... well speaking of my dramas and what not. I feel like I have a shota-complex. I noticed I like guys that look like kids... or have a childish look to them. <3 So cuteee~
One example is my newly discovered Japanese model/actor, Kanata Hongo.
I go slight fangirl-mode at pictures of him. So cuteee~ even though he's like 19 years old he looks like a middle-schooler. Eto... completely different from my Tachi, but similar to my current interest -blush-
Here's a Hetalia "live-action" cast video. Completely fanmade, but Kanata Hongo was chosen to be Japan/Kiku. Hahahahaaaa Kawaiii~ <3
Ugh... well lately I haven't been finding much Hitman Reborn videos that I really liked to be put here, so I guess I will have to settle with more Hetalia stuff.
Here's the awesome video that all Hetalia fans know of because if it's beautiful animation <3 Totally awesome
Yeah... and this was just an awesome cosplay skit I've ever seen for Hetalia
Another Thing
Apparently Justin is going to homecomming with Kristen, dangggg I'm going to get left behind when it comes to relationships. Haha XD
Must be my otakuness that gets in the way. Well not that mind.
Friday, September 11, 2009
Family, Pocky, Cake, and Anime
As the random title doesn't specify, this post will be my little rant with lots of fun videos that I love to put on this blogger! :D
Now one I just found like 5 mins ago and is watching over and over again.
The APH POCKY COMMERICAL XD hehe
South Italy, Japan, Poland, Prussia, England, Finland <3
Yay! Now for some real life updates.
Hilary has joined Honors World History and now I'm worried. She keeps saying she's going to die... and I start feeling like it's my fault for causing her to suffer so much. =.= Well she had her history quiz today (the one I failed) and I gave her a lot of help so I hope she does well, or I would feel extremely bad.
Hm... well. School is something very sullen to me. It's nothing great but nothing bad either, I find a hard time getting high at school. The only thing that works for me is watching anime in Japanese class. And that's very rare.
Well it has be announced by Diehl-sensei that we will be going to Japan this year. I'm sooo excited since I love class trips as well as spending nights with friends. Though New York was painful since Hilary and Yujin refused to sleep as Marisa transformed into a log.
Well I think it's time for another vid!
Haha I love this video. About the Vongola Family sung by the actual voice actors as well! (They all sing so well! X3) Hibari and Mukuro's voice actors are very fangirling worthy and I originally loved Yamamoto and Tsuna's sing voice from the beginning.
Well recently my own "family" has grown as well.
Recently Surti has told me she is joining our group! :D I'm quite happy about that. Currently our group consists of 7 people.
Me, Mar, Kimchi, Hilary, Elora, Jesscia, and now Surti. Haha
So far Surti hasn't completely settled in, but I don't think it'll take too long.
Haha now with seven, I get to fangirl some more and add Surti to my made up Vongola Family. I think she would be fine as the Thunder Guardian.
Not sure if I want to tell her though, since... she might think of me even weirder compared to what she thinks of me now. Haha... Though it still makes me happy
The Roles so Far
Sky: Tammy (Me)
Rain: Hilary
Storm: Maru
Cloud: Kimchi
Sun: Jessica
Mist: Elora
Thunder: Surti
And with this... My (11th generation?) Vongola family is completed.
Haha Next VID!
Uh... well I just noticed that I can't embed this video, so here's the link if you peoples have enough interest on clicking on the link.
APH Japan w/ Ali Project
Watching this, it kinda makes me feel like, looking into my heart. The dark corners that I don't want to come back towards me. This is why I love Ali Project. Their dark music just reaches into the depths of my heart to soothe the sadness and hate.
Haha sometimes I even cry listening to Ali Project.
As the vid describes, sometimes I feel like I truly am Japan from Hetalia. Just. not "am" but I just feel... hm... it's hard to explain. Just the same feelings of being alone and having hard times trusting people with the outer mask. The ambition to claim everyone into your own thoughts, but end up being hated. I guess I feel the same way...
Haha To another video more cheerful.
Wow. this was the best Hetalia cosplay video I have ever seen and the dances were pretty cool too. I really liked China and America in this video. They seemed really cool haha.
I was thinking. If I'm Japan, then what is everyone else?
At times I think I am Japan and Italy. Since I also have the stupid idiotic characteristic when I am happy.
For Mar... I would say she reminds me of England. The person who tries to act tough, but ends up getting picked on anyways.
I haven't come to a hetalia country/character for everyone yet, though I shall continue to think about it! Haha. Well I think that's it for my post for today. So longggg~
Well enjoy one last video.
The recorder version of Sakura Rock by Hibari and Mukuro
Now one I just found like 5 mins ago and is watching over and over again.
The APH POCKY COMMERICAL XD hehe
South Italy, Japan, Poland, Prussia, England, Finland <3
Yay! Now for some real life updates.
Hilary has joined Honors World History and now I'm worried. She keeps saying she's going to die... and I start feeling like it's my fault for causing her to suffer so much. =.= Well she had her history quiz today (the one I failed) and I gave her a lot of help so I hope she does well, or I would feel extremely bad.
Hm... well. School is something very sullen to me. It's nothing great but nothing bad either, I find a hard time getting high at school. The only thing that works for me is watching anime in Japanese class. And that's very rare.
Well it has be announced by Diehl-sensei that we will be going to Japan this year. I'm sooo excited since I love class trips as well as spending nights with friends. Though New York was painful since Hilary and Yujin refused to sleep as Marisa transformed into a log.
Well I think it's time for another vid!
Haha I love this video. About the Vongola Family sung by the actual voice actors as well! (They all sing so well! X3) Hibari and Mukuro's voice actors are very fangirling worthy and I originally loved Yamamoto and Tsuna's sing voice from the beginning.
Well recently my own "family" has grown as well.
Recently Surti has told me she is joining our group! :D I'm quite happy about that. Currently our group consists of 7 people.
Me, Mar, Kimchi, Hilary, Elora, Jesscia, and now Surti. Haha
So far Surti hasn't completely settled in, but I don't think it'll take too long.
Haha now with seven, I get to fangirl some more and add Surti to my made up Vongola Family. I think she would be fine as the Thunder Guardian.
Not sure if I want to tell her though, since... she might think of me even weirder compared to what she thinks of me now. Haha... Though it still makes me happy
The Roles so Far
Sky: Tammy (Me)
Rain: Hilary
Storm: Maru
Cloud: Kimchi
Sun: Jessica
Mist: Elora
Thunder: Surti
And with this... My (11th generation?) Vongola family is completed.
Haha Next VID!
Uh... well I just noticed that I can't embed this video, so here's the link if you peoples have enough interest on clicking on the link.
APH Japan w/ Ali Project
Watching this, it kinda makes me feel like, looking into my heart. The dark corners that I don't want to come back towards me. This is why I love Ali Project. Their dark music just reaches into the depths of my heart to soothe the sadness and hate.
Haha sometimes I even cry listening to Ali Project.
As the vid describes, sometimes I feel like I truly am Japan from Hetalia. Just. not "am" but I just feel... hm... it's hard to explain. Just the same feelings of being alone and having hard times trusting people with the outer mask. The ambition to claim everyone into your own thoughts, but end up being hated. I guess I feel the same way...
Haha To another video more cheerful.
Wow. this was the best Hetalia cosplay video I have ever seen and the dances were pretty cool too. I really liked China and America in this video. They seemed really cool haha.
I was thinking. If I'm Japan, then what is everyone else?
At times I think I am Japan and Italy. Since I also have the stupid idiotic characteristic when I am happy.
For Mar... I would say she reminds me of England. The person who tries to act tough, but ends up getting picked on anyways.
I haven't come to a hetalia country/character for everyone yet, though I shall continue to think about it! Haha. Well I think that's it for my post for today. So longggg~
Well enjoy one last video.
The recorder version of Sakura Rock by Hibari and Mukuro
Monday, September 7, 2009
Busy Business
Ello Ello Peoples of this world! :D
I've been in a good mood surprisingly, maybe it's because my mom's been on a Couch spree lately and I took care of some business that has been bothering me lately.
Well... today I finally found an awesome present for Maru-maru <3
I'm quite happy. I don't know if she'll like it, but I looked at it forever when I got to the Coach store.
-Scene- Couch Store
*standing next to dad checking out*
-looking at the key chains and little trinkets and sees the possible gift-
Me: ... Stareeeee~.... ........... Maru Chan..... hm.... (thinking for a longgg time)
So... I thought about it for a long time. I think there's a chance she will like it. I hope so, but that made my day. Just being able to get my friend a gift really brightens my day like nothing else. So I'm extremely happy today! :D
Hm... well another convo I had with my family I found entertaining.
-Scene- Going to Cello Lessons
Mom: Do you see those motor scooters? They look nice.
Me: ... =.= NO! I hate those...
Dad: Maybe it'll be more suitable for you grandchildren
Me: ... what grandchildren?
Dad: the one's you're going to have
Me: ... no way... why should I
Dad: to pass on my DNA
Me: Why should I do that? I'll save the next the generation.
Mom: LOL
Haha... indeed... I'm quite interesting. Well... that's all for my "outside" life
Now for my internet/cyber life
Hm... well I finished up Hitman Reborn and hit the manga. And... now I'm done with the manga too... Seriously... the anime is so caught up with the manga. So... the anime is now having fillers. No wonder I felt something different about the current episodes. No wonder the story felt kinda weird when I watched the fillers.
Well... reading the manga, one thing struck me... The MOTORBIKES! <3 OMG seriously love! Seeing Tsuna, Yamamoto, and Gokudera on the moterbikes. Heheheheeeee -starts fangirling- Well... now I'm just hanging around waiting for the next Hetalia and Hitman Reborn episodes.
Well here's the video of the day!
Ok... lets see. Story writing!
Indeed. I've been writing more again since my mood has been getting better. I'm writing a bit of Glass Moon and starting to write an idea of the story/drama I assigned to Hilary. Since I really like the idea, I decided to take it a bit upon myself. Well here's the summary I wrote for it.
Awesome desho? haha not really, but I have a lot of great ideas for it compared to the little ideas I have for Glass Moon. But look forward to it on FictionPress if I do end up posting it online. Haha
Well... I think that's all for today I guess. Some stuff of the day
Song of the Day: Utada Hikaru - Beautiful Day
OST of the Day: Tsuna Awakens
Manga of the Day: Shugo Chara
Anime of the Day: Spice and Wolf
Phrase of the Day: "Wha???"
Thought of the Day: Small boxes are cute
Pix of the Day: Taiwan's thought "Eto... Kiku-san?"
Random Vid:
I've been in a good mood surprisingly, maybe it's because my mom's been on a Couch spree lately and I took care of some business that has been bothering me lately.
Well... today I finally found an awesome present for Maru-maru <3
I'm quite happy. I don't know if she'll like it, but I looked at it forever when I got to the Coach store.
-Scene- Couch Store
*standing next to dad checking out*
-looking at the key chains and little trinkets and sees the possible gift-
Me: ... Stareeeee~.... ........... Maru Chan..... hm.... (thinking for a longgg time)
So... I thought about it for a long time. I think there's a chance she will like it. I hope so, but that made my day. Just being able to get my friend a gift really brightens my day like nothing else. So I'm extremely happy today! :D
Hm... well another convo I had with my family I found entertaining.
-Scene- Going to Cello Lessons
Mom: Do you see those motor scooters? They look nice.
Me: ... =.= NO! I hate those...
Dad: Maybe it'll be more suitable for you grandchildren
Me: ... what grandchildren?
Dad: the one's you're going to have
Me: ... no way... why should I
Dad: to pass on my DNA
Me: Why should I do that? I'll save the next the generation.
Mom: LOL
Haha... indeed... I'm quite interesting. Well... that's all for my "outside" life
Now for my internet/cyber life
Hm... well I finished up Hitman Reborn and hit the manga. And... now I'm done with the manga too... Seriously... the anime is so caught up with the manga. So... the anime is now having fillers. No wonder I felt something different about the current episodes. No wonder the story felt kinda weird when I watched the fillers.
Well... reading the manga, one thing struck me... The MOTORBIKES! <3 OMG seriously love! Seeing Tsuna, Yamamoto, and Gokudera on the moterbikes. Heheheheeeee -starts fangirling- Well... now I'm just hanging around waiting for the next Hetalia and Hitman Reborn episodes.
Well here's the video of the day!
Ok... lets see. Story writing!
Indeed. I've been writing more again since my mood has been getting better. I'm writing a bit of Glass Moon and starting to write an idea of the story/drama I assigned to Hilary. Since I really like the idea, I decided to take it a bit upon myself. Well here's the summary I wrote for it.
Everyone loves to read those love stories right? The poor commoner girl who unexpectedly meets the rich, handsome, man of her dreams and falls in love. It’s so cliché, but also a dream of mine. But I’m not just any commoner girl; I’m THE pathetic commoner girl. Who knew my grandparents would send me to Taiwan to fulfill an unbelievable task: meet and seduce the son of a powerful company CEO to bring power and wealth to the family. I’m so going to die trying.
Awesome desho? haha not really, but I have a lot of great ideas for it compared to the little ideas I have for Glass Moon. But look forward to it on FictionPress if I do end up posting it online. Haha
Well... I think that's all for today I guess. Some stuff of the day
Song of the Day: Utada Hikaru - Beautiful Day
OST of the Day: Tsuna Awakens
Manga of the Day: Shugo Chara
Anime of the Day: Spice and Wolf
Phrase of the Day: "Wha???"
Thought of the Day: Small boxes are cute
Pix of the Day: Taiwan's thought "Eto... Kiku-san?"
Random Vid:
Monday, August 31, 2009
I can be Sarcastic?! O.o
Ok... it's been a week or so. So... I shall be updating my blog! Yay! Another thing is that Hilary is telling me I should. So I'm thinking of something.
Well today something totally stupid but interesting happened. Well as most people know, today I had a missing water bottle. I put a waterbottle into my backpack this morning and apparently it got lost in my backpack.
I got home today, thirsty... very thirsty and tried to find the waterbottle that I lost since I KNOW I took one and put it into my backpack. So. In the afternoon I had no luck, then just... 5 mins ago, as I was packing up for school tomorrow, I was confused on how heavy the front pocket was. So I opened the front pocket and voila there was the waterbottle.
I seriously feel stupid though, I walked around school about not having water and yet there was a waterbottle in the front pocket! I guess I put it there by mistake while I was rushing to get out of the house.
Haha... still feels pretty stupid.
Hm... ok... lets see...
Today I noticed that I've been talking pretty monotone in person. I don't feel very different on the internet or at school, but apparently I have stoned my emotions just slightly. Haha. Not sure if it's good or bad, but I wonder.
So... I talked to Mar for like... 5 mins on aim today and I asked her... "Am I sarcastic lately?"
And she said I have been. I'm not quite sure how I got to this point, but I get the feeling there's nothing really important in my life anymore. Everything just seems bland to me. Of course that's not the case, but it just feels like it in minor situations where it doesn't matter what happens.
Hm... What else.. well... My mom got me my first pair of SKINNY JEANS! Now... I'm pretty excited about that (in a sarcastic kind of way) but other people don't seem to care. D: well I don't blame them, skinny jeans are the norm of school wear. But I'm not going to start wearing nice clothes to school now.
I'm in the process of modernizing, (remembers embarrassing show on how old-fashion I am today). Whenever I say I'm modernizing I feel like Japan... To Modernization!
Uh... well. I decided not to wear nice "modernized" clothes to school now since, I don't find the reason.
It's not like anyone really cares or notices, and... my existence is just slightly above invisible.
Well it's not like I'm trying to impress anyone, not that I like anyone in the school so, why do I try to show off my good side.
Hm... well.. also I've been quite obsessed with Hetalia AND Hitman Reborn <3
I love the series on so much >3
So now I'm curious. I tried doing many quizes about Hitman Reborn honestly to see my Ring Attribute and apparently Sky or Rain. Which are both very good results.
Tsuna and Yamamoto! Tsuna can be cool in his Hyper mood >D
Hm... I would like to see my friend's ring attribute. Maybe we can have something like the Akatsuki again. Haha... the good ole days when I was obsessed.
(still Itachi luvin')
Well... that shall be my post for today. I might write another tomorrow :D since I know I have more to say, just not today.
Well today something totally stupid but interesting happened. Well as most people know, today I had a missing water bottle. I put a waterbottle into my backpack this morning and apparently it got lost in my backpack.
I got home today, thirsty... very thirsty and tried to find the waterbottle that I lost since I KNOW I took one and put it into my backpack. So. In the afternoon I had no luck, then just... 5 mins ago, as I was packing up for school tomorrow, I was confused on how heavy the front pocket was. So I opened the front pocket and voila there was the waterbottle.
I seriously feel stupid though, I walked around school about not having water and yet there was a waterbottle in the front pocket! I guess I put it there by mistake while I was rushing to get out of the house.
Haha... still feels pretty stupid.
Hm... ok... lets see...
Today I noticed that I've been talking pretty monotone in person. I don't feel very different on the internet or at school, but apparently I have stoned my emotions just slightly. Haha. Not sure if it's good or bad, but I wonder.
So... I talked to Mar for like... 5 mins on aim today and I asked her... "Am I sarcastic lately?"
And she said I have been. I'm not quite sure how I got to this point, but I get the feeling there's nothing really important in my life anymore. Everything just seems bland to me. Of course that's not the case, but it just feels like it in minor situations where it doesn't matter what happens.
Hm... What else.. well... My mom got me my first pair of SKINNY JEANS! Now... I'm pretty excited about that (in a sarcastic kind of way) but other people don't seem to care. D: well I don't blame them, skinny jeans are the norm of school wear. But I'm not going to start wearing nice clothes to school now.
I'm in the process of modernizing, (remembers embarrassing show on how old-fashion I am today). Whenever I say I'm modernizing I feel like Japan... To Modernization!
Uh... well. I decided not to wear nice "modernized" clothes to school now since, I don't find the reason.
It's not like anyone really cares or notices, and... my existence is just slightly above invisible.
Well it's not like I'm trying to impress anyone, not that I like anyone in the school so, why do I try to show off my good side.
Hm... well.. also I've been quite obsessed with Hetalia AND Hitman Reborn <3
I love the series on so much >3
So now I'm curious. I tried doing many quizes about Hitman Reborn honestly to see my Ring Attribute and apparently Sky or Rain. Which are both very good results.
Tsuna and Yamamoto! Tsuna can be cool in his Hyper mood >D
Hm... I would like to see my friend's ring attribute. Maybe we can have something like the Akatsuki again. Haha... the good ole days when I was obsessed.
(still Itachi luvin')
Well... that shall be my post for today. I might write another tomorrow :D since I know I have more to say, just not today.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
The Past Returns
Alright. I'm feeling better from yesterday, so now I need to replace the sad post with a more interesting one.
Hm... though my dad did complain about my life again, so I can't do anything about that.
Uh... Well apparently EVERYONE is gone. Except for Jessica and we really don't know what to do. Usually outings are with 3 or more people. So just being the two of us really is kinda odd. Even elora isn't around to.
Maru-chan = NY
Hiyori = Taiwan
Yujin = Korea (I think)
Elora = Boston
=.= seriously everyone's gone. I'm barely staying entertained while I stay home in front of the computer and obsess over Hetalia.
Hm... we'll I have another interesting hetalia vid
Watch is the Japanoid (Vocaloid Kaito) complain about his love for salt in music.
Haha I had a few more, but from the three I had, I liked this one I guess. I'll use the rest for other post ^^
Hm... well another thing I saw on youtube is the Male versions of K-ON songs and by far... they sound pretty good
Though some other fans say that Yuu (male version of Yui's voice) is too high, but I think it sounds fine. Reminds me of Italy's voice childish and high for a guy.
Now some songs I shall post.
Tsubasa o Kudasai (Please Give Me Wings)
Watashi no Koi wa Hotchikiss (My Love is a Stapler)
Haha these were my fave "gender-bender" songs from K-ON.
Hm... Well there was a typhoon that hit Taiwan recently. Luckly it didn't effect Taipei that much so that Hilary and my family wasn't effect by it that much. But the Central and Southern parts of Taiwan got hit the most and many homes were destroyed in the flood and mudslides.
Everyone Please Send Your Prayers, Hopes, and Wishes to Them!
I found a Hetalia comic based on this: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
Indeed...
Well something happened recently that I couldn't really tell anyone since no one was on Facebook.
My best friend and crush in 3rd grade added me on facebook. I was quite shocked. He's the one that I confessed to and then he moved. =.=
I was surprised to hear from him again. So this is why the title of the post is like so.
Well, we chatted just a bit and it seems he's an anime fan too. Not a Otaku yet though, since he watches only mainstream series.
It was kinda weird talking to him again and he was kinda like, "I wish I could go back to Pleasanton and see you again!"
It was kinda weird at the same time... since he's the only guy I confessed to in elementary school that accepted it. So... it was like "uh... haha yeah.... :)"
Indeed... I seriously hope this isn't a sign that the past WILL return. But then that's not too bad either since then I might see Kouhei again. HAHA... weird of me.
Sadly though, my heart belongs to someone else ;D (going to use him as an excuse now)
Haha... so this is how the past returns to greet me.
OH! By the wayyy~ apparently I lost 13 pounds this summer! I'm so proud. I get a feeling I might lose another in the next two days. So I shall keep the blog updated on my weight loss. XD
Hm... though my dad did complain about my life again, so I can't do anything about that.
Uh... Well apparently EVERYONE is gone. Except for Jessica and we really don't know what to do. Usually outings are with 3 or more people. So just being the two of us really is kinda odd. Even elora isn't around to.
Maru-chan = NY
Hiyori = Taiwan
Yujin = Korea (I think)
Elora = Boston
=.= seriously everyone's gone. I'm barely staying entertained while I stay home in front of the computer and obsess over Hetalia.
Hm... we'll I have another interesting hetalia vid
Watch is the Japanoid (Vocaloid Kaito) complain about his love for salt in music.
Haha I had a few more, but from the three I had, I liked this one I guess. I'll use the rest for other post ^^
Hm... well another thing I saw on youtube is the Male versions of K-ON songs and by far... they sound pretty good
Though some other fans say that Yuu (male version of Yui's voice) is too high, but I think it sounds fine. Reminds me of Italy's voice childish and high for a guy.
Now some songs I shall post.
Tsubasa o Kudasai (Please Give Me Wings)
Watashi no Koi wa Hotchikiss (My Love is a Stapler)
Haha these were my fave "gender-bender" songs from K-ON.
Hm... Well there was a typhoon that hit Taiwan recently. Luckly it didn't effect Taipei that much so that Hilary and my family wasn't effect by it that much. But the Central and Southern parts of Taiwan got hit the most and many homes were destroyed in the flood and mudslides.
Everyone Please Send Your Prayers, Hopes, and Wishes to Them!
I found a Hetalia comic based on this: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
Indeed...
Well something happened recently that I couldn't really tell anyone since no one was on Facebook.
My best friend and crush in 3rd grade added me on facebook. I was quite shocked. He's the one that I confessed to and then he moved. =.=
I was surprised to hear from him again. So this is why the title of the post is like so.
Well, we chatted just a bit and it seems he's an anime fan too. Not a Otaku yet though, since he watches only mainstream series.
It was kinda weird talking to him again and he was kinda like, "I wish I could go back to Pleasanton and see you again!"
It was kinda weird at the same time... since he's the only guy I confessed to in elementary school that accepted it. So... it was like "uh... haha yeah.... :)"
Indeed... I seriously hope this isn't a sign that the past WILL return. But then that's not too bad either since then I might see Kouhei again. HAHA... weird of me.
Sadly though, my heart belongs to someone else ;D (going to use him as an excuse now)
Haha... so this is how the past returns to greet me.
OH! By the wayyy~ apparently I lost 13 pounds this summer! I'm so proud. I get a feeling I might lose another in the next two days. So I shall keep the blog updated on my weight loss. XD
Sunday, August 16, 2009
am i really HOPELESS, Useless?
Hello blogger. Something struck me today and I just needed to get it out someway somehow.
Today my dad yelled at me again. I'm not quite sure why. Well it wasn't "yelling" exactly, but we argued in the car. I seriously don't know why he was so mad. I started crying when I got home. It wasn't a bawling cry, but tears came out and I wanted to scream my heart out.
"YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW ME! I CAN'T EVEN SEE YOU AS MY DAD!"
how come
Tears fell and I ran the conversation through my head again.
It started when I got on the car from tutor lessons. My mom was driving with my dad at the passenger seat.
I was telling my mom the time for next time and my dad started to ramble on about what's the point since I'm not going to study anyways.
This didn't hurt as much since he's already said it so many times. So just continued to ask my mom about things.
But my dad continued to ramble and shame me. He kept telling me I was hopeless and to be an interior designer I didn't need to study since that's how low my standard are. Said I didn't even need to go to college.
This hurt. Even though he's said it before, I just wanted to punch him each time.
I told my mom, "See mom... I told you dad doesn't care about me at all. I could die in the streets and he won't care."
Then my dad said, "Then go die. Not like you have any use anyways"
Even though it was from the person I hate most, it hurt like hell. Sure my grades aren't as great as Kim's nor Andy's, but there's no need to say that I should die and I'm unless in life.
Maybe this is how I told myself that I don't belong in this world.
So... I let it go. Because, this person... so-called my "dad" doesn't know me AT ALL.
Sure I don't like reading... and I don't read REAL books. But because I lack normal books and novels. I'm reading TEXTBOOKS during my free time.
He only sees me watching anime and dramas, drawing, and reading manga because I finished the stupid homework he gave me.
This person doesn't know who I am. He's not worth it. Not even worth ranting about in this blog. But I just need to get it out since I suck at keeping journals.
Something that matters more to me is my mom and my friends, since they're the only people I can turn to.
Sure there's Itachi... but, I wish there was a more "physical" version of him so I could hug him or he could hug me. Maybe that's what I need, a hug. Something that my mom won't give me and my friends find awkward.
Maybe I just need someone who could lend me a shoulder and let me cry so I don't have to curl up in the closet and sob silently.
I'm afraid to tell my friends. They once told me I'm too dramatic, as if I'm trying to make a Korean drama or something. I wish I could just say. It really hurts. It's collected inside and coming out just a bit as tears. As the underlying problem slowly destroys me from the inside.
Once mar said to me in one of her attempts to get me to open, "You're hopeless."
I knew she didn't mean it the same way as the other times I've been called hopeless, but it still stung to be called that from a friend that I cherish.
I realized today, that I don't know any of my good points, I don't think I have them. I'm not smart, pretty, skinny, tough, kind, friendly, sociable, popular, attractive, strong, funny, rich, talented, artistic, there's not even one thing I can be proud of myself.
-I say I'm Taiwanese and is proud of it. But I'm more of a disgrace to Taiwanese.
-I claim my Japanese is good, but there are people who are better than me.
-I think I'm an awesome TA for wisdom, that's just my imagination.
-I say I have the chance of being the Japanese club prez senior year. It's not possible for me.
-Good at swimming? No... there's people who beat me by a mile.
-My chinese is good? Not at all. I just don't have an accent.
-I think I'm mature. HA that's wishful thinking.
-I wonder if I'm street smart. that's impossible. In the city I'll just be raped and killed or something.
I have nothing to be proud about myself.
Otakuness? I'm only 60% otaku and there's people more dedicated. Though, I'm to the point where I seriously have no life and will fail in the future.
It hurts to be told that everyday. Maybe I'm just being dramatic again. I'm trying hard to change myself. Maybe it's really just not enough. I give up I guess.
I just want to go to the closet and cry again. Well. I do have some other news, but I afraid this post isn't the post to do it.
Well. We'll see if I can wake up with panda eyes in the morning.
Today my dad yelled at me again. I'm not quite sure why. Well it wasn't "yelling" exactly, but we argued in the car. I seriously don't know why he was so mad. I started crying when I got home. It wasn't a bawling cry, but tears came out and I wanted to scream my heart out.
"YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW ME! I CAN'T EVEN SEE YOU AS MY DAD!"
how come
Tears fell and I ran the conversation through my head again.
It started when I got on the car from tutor lessons. My mom was driving with my dad at the passenger seat.
I was telling my mom the time for next time and my dad started to ramble on about what's the point since I'm not going to study anyways.
This didn't hurt as much since he's already said it so many times. So just continued to ask my mom about things.
But my dad continued to ramble and shame me. He kept telling me I was hopeless and to be an interior designer I didn't need to study since that's how low my standard are. Said I didn't even need to go to college.
This hurt. Even though he's said it before, I just wanted to punch him each time.
I told my mom, "See mom... I told you dad doesn't care about me at all. I could die in the streets and he won't care."
Then my dad said, "Then go die. Not like you have any use anyways"
Even though it was from the person I hate most, it hurt like hell. Sure my grades aren't as great as Kim's nor Andy's, but there's no need to say that I should die and I'm unless in life.
Maybe this is how I told myself that I don't belong in this world.
So... I let it go. Because, this person... so-called my "dad" doesn't know me AT ALL.
Sure I don't like reading... and I don't read REAL books. But because I lack normal books and novels. I'm reading TEXTBOOKS during my free time.
He only sees me watching anime and dramas, drawing, and reading manga because I finished the stupid homework he gave me.
This person doesn't know who I am. He's not worth it. Not even worth ranting about in this blog. But I just need to get it out since I suck at keeping journals.
Something that matters more to me is my mom and my friends, since they're the only people I can turn to.
Sure there's Itachi... but, I wish there was a more "physical" version of him so I could hug him or he could hug me. Maybe that's what I need, a hug. Something that my mom won't give me and my friends find awkward.
Maybe I just need someone who could lend me a shoulder and let me cry so I don't have to curl up in the closet and sob silently.
I'm afraid to tell my friends. They once told me I'm too dramatic, as if I'm trying to make a Korean drama or something. I wish I could just say. It really hurts. It's collected inside and coming out just a bit as tears. As the underlying problem slowly destroys me from the inside.
Once mar said to me in one of her attempts to get me to open, "You're hopeless."
I knew she didn't mean it the same way as the other times I've been called hopeless, but it still stung to be called that from a friend that I cherish.
I realized today, that I don't know any of my good points, I don't think I have them. I'm not smart, pretty, skinny, tough, kind, friendly, sociable, popular, attractive, strong, funny, rich, talented, artistic, there's not even one thing I can be proud of myself.
-I say I'm Taiwanese and is proud of it. But I'm more of a disgrace to Taiwanese.
-I claim my Japanese is good, but there are people who are better than me.
-I think I'm an awesome TA for wisdom, that's just my imagination.
-I say I have the chance of being the Japanese club prez senior year. It's not possible for me.
-Good at swimming? No... there's people who beat me by a mile.
-My chinese is good? Not at all. I just don't have an accent.
-I think I'm mature. HA that's wishful thinking.
-I wonder if I'm street smart. that's impossible. In the city I'll just be raped and killed or something.
I have nothing to be proud about myself.
Otakuness? I'm only 60% otaku and there's people more dedicated. Though, I'm to the point where I seriously have no life and will fail in the future.
It hurts to be told that everyday. Maybe I'm just being dramatic again. I'm trying hard to change myself. Maybe it's really just not enough. I give up I guess.
I just want to go to the closet and cry again. Well. I do have some other news, but I afraid this post isn't the post to do it.
Well. We'll see if I can wake up with panda eyes in the morning.
Monday, August 10, 2009
Random Drabbles
Uh... indeed... So it's been a while since I updated here. And. By that I'm starting to be afraid to. But I shall anyways. Since I made this for a reason and it shall fulfill it's purpose.
Well lately one thing has been on my mind... and that is the problem! I'm not going to say much about of it. But I'm tired of it.
Is it possible just to completely start over and not care what happens anymore. That's what I want to do. Well... No more talk about this. It's starting to annoy me. But this is what's making life such a pain.
Ok... well... lately I've been aura sense. As one would say it. I noticed I can sense lots of auras even through the internet. But... the only aura I can't sense is how much people care about me. I wonder why that is. Well. I shall ponder over that much more.
It's pretty lonely for me in P-town lately. Since Hilary's gone to taiwan and Maru-chan's going to NY soon. I'm going to miss them, I do hope they come back though, so we can all hang out together again. Maybe a mall trip. Seriously... only I haven't been to the great mall before. =.= I seriously have never been shopping in the great mall before. There's something wrong with me.
Hm... lets see. Hetalia obsessions go on! Of course. I'm starting to love lots of characters and I started to accept SOME Yaoi pairs
So far as far as my Hetalia pairings go
UK x China
Taiwan x Japan
N. Italy x Germany
Indeed. That is all I accept so far. Yay! XD uhhh well I'm lovin the series. I hope the manga volume 3 comes out soon! I really want to see Taiwan appear in the series! TAIWANNN~
ER... Indeed. Japan is cute too... though I love ALL Hetalia charas! <3>///< height="265" width="320">
UK being uber cute X3 sung also by his voice actor <3 sasuke =".=")" height="265" width="320">
And the sad video. I was about to cry watching this about China's history. Beautiful video though
Well I'll leave it at that today. Leave more vids for another day
BTW today I decided to check out how Naruto Shippuden was doing :3 and to my luck I was watching part one of episode 121. And oh how I fangirled >D
The first scene was my love for so long... ITACHI! <3>D
I am so pathetic... seriously... I like 2D guys... TT^TT I need a real crush or something. This is dangerous.
Uh... Well lets leave more fangirling to another day shall we :)
Well lately one thing has been on my mind... and that is the problem! I'm not going to say much about of it. But I'm tired of it.
Is it possible just to completely start over and not care what happens anymore. That's what I want to do. Well... No more talk about this. It's starting to annoy me. But this is what's making life such a pain.
Ok... well... lately I've been aura sense. As one would say it. I noticed I can sense lots of auras even through the internet. But... the only aura I can't sense is how much people care about me. I wonder why that is. Well. I shall ponder over that much more.
It's pretty lonely for me in P-town lately. Since Hilary's gone to taiwan and Maru-chan's going to NY soon. I'm going to miss them, I do hope they come back though, so we can all hang out together again. Maybe a mall trip. Seriously... only I haven't been to the great mall before. =.= I seriously have never been shopping in the great mall before. There's something wrong with me.
Hm... lets see. Hetalia obsessions go on! Of course. I'm starting to love lots of characters and I started to accept SOME Yaoi pairs
So far as far as my Hetalia pairings go
UK x China
Taiwan x Japan
N. Italy x Germany
Indeed. That is all I accept so far. Yay! XD uhhh well I'm lovin the series. I hope the manga volume 3 comes out soon! I really want to see Taiwan appear in the series! TAIWANNN~
ER... Indeed. Japan is cute too... though I love ALL Hetalia charas! <3>///< height="265" width="320">
UK being uber cute X3 sung also by his voice actor <3 sasuke =".=")" height="265" width="320">
And the sad video. I was about to cry watching this about China's history. Beautiful video though
Well I'll leave it at that today. Leave more vids for another day
BTW today I decided to check out how Naruto Shippuden was doing :3 and to my luck I was watching part one of episode 121. And oh how I fangirled >D
The first scene was my love for so long... ITACHI! <3>D
I am so pathetic... seriously... I like 2D guys... TT^TT I need a real crush or something. This is dangerous.
Uh... Well lets leave more fangirling to another day shall we :)
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Newest Obsession: Hetalia!
Ok. I've been slacking in writing in my blog. Shame on me. Well I have to say I've been obsession about HETALIA! I love this series <3 It so funny and it's historical too!
I think I'm going to love world history and imagine the countries interacting.
LOL well so far my favorite characters are of course the characters of Hetalia Asia! X3
Including: Taiwan, China, Japan, Hong Kong, and Korea! X3
Out of the Asia5 I love Taiwan and Japan the most. (course desu nee)
It's also my favorite pairing! <3 I support TaiwanxJapan! They're so cute together and the history works too I guess.
My Asian history knowledge is pretty low, but I think there was the time when China had to surrender Taiwan to Japan. And Taiwan and Japan where together for... 50 years? But then after World War II Japan had to surrender Taiwan after the losing. Kinda sad, but they're a cute pair! Support support!
Right now I think I love Japan the most, since he comes out in the series and is one of the main characters. But I think once Taiwan appears in volume 3, she'll be boosted in the character list.
LOL well another thing I'm obsessed with is the Delicious Tomato Song sang by the voice actor of Romano Italy. aka S. Italy. LOL it's so catchy X3 and I love the song.
Aha uh...what else I've been watching lots of Hetalia vids since the animes aren't really on time out... so I have to live the obsession other ways right X3
YAY FOR HETALIA ASIA! <3
LOL ok... well my favorite fanarted quote, this can be found in APH the Great China! AMV
Taiwan: I'm going to marry Japan after all!
Japan: -in the side- ? :0
China: NO TAIWAN! You're just a child! I'll give you a panda!
Taiwan: Don't treat me like a child! I... I don't want a lovely panda....
China: Anyways! I'll give you one! Just stay at my home!
-In the end China wins XD-
And how... the panda's Tuan Tuan Yuan Yuan came to be X3
LOL
I love China and it's so sweet how he's the onii-chan of the Hetalia Asia. AIYA! XD
Another character I really love is Korea! He's so funny. There was this comic of him boob groping Japan. It was hilarious. Now I know why Korea protested. Haha X3 <3 it was an epic scene though. And I saw a picture of Japan getting revenge and grouping him back. AHA... funny <3
Also... saddest Hetalia picture I've ever seen...
Japan after World War II. Stabbed in the chest with his own Katana, his blood made the Japanese flag and Taiwan is with hi. TT^TT So sad... I almost cried.
LOL ok well there's bound to be more posts about Hetalia since I'm just obsessed like that >3
I think I'm going to love world history and imagine the countries interacting.
LOL well so far my favorite characters are of course the characters of Hetalia Asia! X3
Including: Taiwan, China, Japan, Hong Kong, and Korea! X3
Out of the Asia5 I love Taiwan and Japan the most. (course desu nee)
It's also my favorite pairing! <3 I support TaiwanxJapan! They're so cute together and the history works too I guess.
My Asian history knowledge is pretty low, but I think there was the time when China had to surrender Taiwan to Japan. And Taiwan and Japan where together for... 50 years? But then after World War II Japan had to surrender Taiwan after the losing. Kinda sad, but they're a cute pair! Support support!
Right now I think I love Japan the most, since he comes out in the series and is one of the main characters. But I think once Taiwan appears in volume 3, she'll be boosted in the character list.
LOL well another thing I'm obsessed with is the Delicious Tomato Song sang by the voice actor of Romano Italy. aka S. Italy. LOL it's so catchy X3 and I love the song.
Aha uh...what else I've been watching lots of Hetalia vids since the animes aren't really on time out... so I have to live the obsession other ways right X3
YAY FOR HETALIA ASIA! <3
LOL ok... well my favorite fanarted quote, this can be found in APH the Great China! AMV
Taiwan: I'm going to marry Japan after all!
Japan: -in the side- ? :0
China: NO TAIWAN! You're just a child! I'll give you a panda!
Taiwan: Don't treat me like a child! I... I don't want a lovely panda....
China: Anyways! I'll give you one! Just stay at my home!
-In the end China wins XD-
And how... the panda's Tuan Tuan Yuan Yuan came to be X3
LOL
I love China and it's so sweet how he's the onii-chan of the Hetalia Asia. AIYA! XD
Another character I really love is Korea! He's so funny. There was this comic of him boob groping Japan. It was hilarious. Now I know why Korea protested. Haha X3 <3 it was an epic scene though. And I saw a picture of Japan getting revenge and grouping him back. AHA... funny <3
Also... saddest Hetalia picture I've ever seen...
Japan after World War II. Stabbed in the chest with his own Katana, his blood made the Japanese flag and Taiwan is with hi. TT^TT So sad... I almost cried.
LOL ok well there's bound to be more posts about Hetalia since I'm just obsessed like that >3
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